Page 70 of Old Acquaintances

I looked up over his head, finding Tucker at the table, watching us. I told Johnny, “You know him. He wouldn’t do that to me.”

“He doesn’t think about that. He thinks he can have you for tonight and everything will go back to normal tomorrow.”

“You’re wrong,” I said. “You don’t really know about us. We have something outside of our friendship with you.”

Johnny groaned, “Really? Ella,come on. He’s an opportunist. I love the guy but I’m looking out for you. You’re just the girl for the night because he needed someone.”

I thought of how he touched me. That couldn’t be faked.

Johnny said, “He always thought you were hot. He just wanted a piece of you, Ell, I’m sorry but that’s the truth.” He pinched his eyes shut. “I told him to leave you alone. I knew he would ruin everything if he did something about it.”

“No.” I backed up. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

I half believed it. Part of me saw the Tucker I knew on our family vacations, in my house, the version who wouldn’t do anything to hurt me because it would upset his mother. But he had a life with Johnny, with his guy friends, outside of me. Who’s to say which version of him was the one who pulled me into a stairwell.

“Whatever, I’m just telling you,” Johnny said. He walked off.

I stood alone, wishing I knew how to feel. Right then, two girls from my grade came up to me. They held a plastic cup in each hand. As they stood in front of me, pushing me into a corner, they said, “This is for Angel.” They tipped all four cups over my head, spilling Cheerwine all down my body.

One of them said, “You’re such a whore, Ella.”

The other said, “Fuck you.”

After a moment of shock, I screamed, the cold liquid dripping down my head. It went between my body and my dress, over my carefully applied makeup, and down my back. My scalp stung from ice cubes. Everyone watched. I tried to breathe, but my vision blurred. I was so humiliated and angry and confused. A figure appeared in front of me.

“Ella?” Tucker said.

“Take me home,” I ordered through tears. I stomped through the room, all eyes on me, and ran when I got into the hallway.

“Ella!” Tucker called out after me.

I didn’t want to stop moving. I didn’t want to stand in an elevator with him and have him try to hold my hand. I pushed open the stairwell door, walking past the place where I’d just kissed him, and hurried down the stairs. The smell of the soda burned. It dripped into my ear, down the tip of my nose. Droplets flicked off when I ran into the parking garage. I bolted to my dad’s car and tugged on the locked handle.

Tucker came up beside me, but I pushed him away. “Don’t touch me!” I screamed.

He was pale, hands up, afraid. “What happened?”

“Youhappened!” I spat. My body convulsed with tears. I pulled on the door handle over and over again until Tucker said:

“Okay!” He unlocked the door and opened it for me.

I sat down and put on my seatbelt. I thought of how pissed my dad would be when he discovered sticky soda marking the seat of his precious car. A black tear hit my lap, staining my ruined dress further.

Tucker got in the car and asked, “What did he say to you?”

He had been watching long enough to know that everything shifted when Johnny pulled me away from him. That’s why he didn’t want Johnny to see us, I realized. Because Johnny knew the truth.

I covered my face and ordered, “Justgo.”

He quietly drove out of the garage. On the way home, he peppered quiet questions, begging me to explain, but I stayed silent. I couldn’t speak between the sobs. My breathing quickened. I felt panic rise. I didn’t know what upset me more - losing the perfect moments I’d had with Tucker, having my hair and dress ruined, or being embarrassed in front of everyone.

I couldn’t breathe. It was the same panic attack I’d had before my driver’s test, my first Sugar Plum performance and my last AP Chemistry test.

I demanded, “Stop the car.”

“What?”

“Pull over!”