Page 100 of Old Acquaintances

I looked up and he was beside me, his mouth twitching, my grandmother’s ring between his thumb and pointer finger. It wasn’t even an engagement ring. It was just a simple ring passed down for generations. He knelt.

“Ella,” he started. His hand went to my knee. “Ella, I love you. I’ve loved you for our entire lives.”

At first, I tried not to laugh. That faded quickly.

He continued, “I love how wild and predictable you are. I love how you’re not afraid to cry and you strip off your clothes when need to feel free. I love watching you dance. I love watching you do anything. I love that you let me be there for you because all I ever want is to protect you and care for you.” His eyes moved. “I love that you wear your hair down. For me.”

My heart skipped. His eyes returned to mine.

“I know I’ll love you forever. I have to. It’s not a question for me. You’re my favorite person in the world. It’s a good day even if I just get to see you. Nothing makes me happier than just being with you.”

I told myself it wasn’t real. Even so, colors muddied behind him and all I saw was this blurry, perfect person in front of me, a distorted image I’ve seen dozens of times, but the tears through which I viewed him then were joyful. And sad. And heartbreaking. He said such lovely things and they belonged to another girl. Some future woman. I just borrowed them for a little while.

Except for the bit about me taking my clothes off.

“Marry me, Ella.”

It wasn’t a question, it was a statement.

“Please,” he added.

I felt the heat from his hand and his eyes - just the two of us - and blinked away my tears. The world opened up.

“Yes,” I breathed. “I’ll marry you.”

He smiled and put my ring back on, a different finger this time. The bar erupted in cheers and Tucker lifted me up, arms around my waist. Held tight to him, I leaned back and kissed him. Soft and lingering. I would borrow this from his future wife, too.

Tucker put me down as a waiter came by with a bottle of champagne and two glasses. I thought,shouldn’t he check our IDs?It was all so ridiculous, me and Tucker engaged at twenty-one, yet it wasn’t. We sat down and were poured champagne. Tucker moved his chair so that it was right beside mine and he slung his arm around my shoulder.

“Tell me if it’s too much. If I’m ruining it,” he said. His nose nestled into my hair.

“It feels nice,” I answered. “I like pretending.”

We finished the bottle by the time our friends texted for dinner. We hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast, and I wasn’t an experienced drinker, so I was a little tipsy. We walked down to the restaurant, Tucker grabbing me before I ran into a vase, telling me to be quiet. I couldn’t stop laughing. I kept thinking of how ridiculous it was that we pretended to be engaged and I flashed back to the little snowman Steven with his micropenis.

Good for Tucker’s future wife, he and Steven weren’t blood-related. She wouldn’t have to worry about that.

I grabbed my head. “Oh no.”

I wanted to not think about these things.

I didn’t want those thoughts in my brain.

When we walked inside, our four friends were still in their snowsuits, cheeks pink and hair wind-swept.

Serena said, “What’s going on here?”

“Is she drunk?” Johnny asked.

“I’ve got her,” Tucker replied, terse. He held me steady, somehow, I didn’t know. I felt a tug every time my body swayed too much one way.

I told them what happened and waved my ring at them. “You wanted it to be a couple’s trip, Johnny,” I teased.

He snapped at Tucker, “Buy her some food.”

Throughout dinner, Johnny was quiet, but everyone else was fine. I sobered up with water and a chicken sandwich, but I kept a little quiet as well. I didn’t know why Johnny was mad at me, or why he didn’t want me to come on the trip, but it was his birthday, and I didn’t want anything to go wrong.

We walked down the hallway after we ate, toward a cozy lounge area in the section of our hotel rooms. When the boys went to get some liquor they brought, I pulled Johnny aside.

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