Page 43 of The Prez

Once he’s had his fill of my mouth, he pulls away and smiles down at me. “Let’s go to bed, baby. I want to hold you tonight.”

I sigh and lean forward, kissing him once more. “Okay. Let me grab the baby monitor.” I made sure to pick one up today after Raf mentioned it last night.

Raf kisses me once more and lets me up. I move fast, grabbing the baby monitor from just inside my bedroom and turning it on. I make sure it works, then I grab a pair of pajama pants from my room.

When I return, Raf is waiting for me, a grin on his face. “Ready?”

“Yeah.” I hold up the baby monitor and reach out a handto him. He takes it and kisses the back, then tips my mouth up to meet his.

He pulls me into his room, sitting me on the bed before he steps inside his bathroom. The water runs and he comes back with a cloth, pulling off my pants to wipe my dick. I drag the new pants on after he tosses my discarded ones in his hamper. Then he shucks his pants and briefs, cleans himself quickly, then climbs in bed naked behind me.

“It’s been a while since I slept with someone,” he mumbles against my skin, kissing it softly. “I’m glad it’s you.”

“Me too.”

“Sleep in here with me from now on? I like you in my bed.”

Sighing happily, I nod. “Okay.”

I smile, my eyes growing heavy as I soak up the feeling of the man behind me. I fall asleep to his lips on his neck, shoulder and back, soft words whispered in Spanish burrowing in my mind.

CHAPTER 12

RAFAEL

A senseof impending doom hovers over me and I can’t figure out why. My life has been going too well, too much going right that it can’t last.

For the past three weeks, things with the clubhouse have been running smoothly; our drug sales are booming and the nightclubs and tattoo parlors are thriving. I’m getting closer to Omari, learning more about him and his body. And I’m getting closer to Little Raf, slowly but surely learning how to care for my nephew. I still feel like I’m not good enough and will end up failing him somehow, but I can feel my heart softening towards him.

But something is telling me it can’t last. Something is coming, something that could possibly break me. I wish I knew what.

“Big Raf,” I hear from my left and I turn to Omari as he walks out of the kitchen, my nephew in his arms. He turned eight months yesterday, growing before my eyes. I’m trying, I really am, but I still keep him at a distance. I can’t let him see more of me, for fear that he’ll blame me for what happenedto his mother. Not now, but in the future, he’ll see who I am. I can’t let that happen.

Omari stops in front of me, his brilliant smile lighting up his face. I smile back, something I’ve been doing a lot lately. “Yeah?”

“I asked if you have everything you need?”

“Yeah. I have my saddle bags packed with the essentials. It’s only about an hour and half away, so I’ll be good.”

“I can’t believe you have on jeans,” Omari says with a grin. “They look good, but I like the slacks more.”

Growling, I pull him close and kiss him hard. “Don’t tease me.” Omari giggles and pushes against my chest. “I’ll be back Sunday night.”

“We’ll be here. Right, big man?” Omari takes Little Raf’s hand and waves it at me.

I want to reach out and touch it, shake it, and laugh and smile at him. But something is holding me back. I’m not sure what, but I can’t give him my everything.

The same holds true for Omari. I don’t want to play with his feelings, but he doesn’t know everything, so I can’t give him all of me. If he knew my past, knew what I did to my own father, knew how I failed my mama and my sister, he wouldn’t want me. So, I’m keeping that part of me secret. And if I can’t give him that piece, we can’t have anything more than what we have now.

“Take care of each other,” I tell him, meaning it in more ways than he could possibly imagine.

“We will. You do the same. Be careful, yeah?”

Sighing at my hopeless thoughts, I grip Omari’s chin and kiss him quickly. “Yeah. I’ll see you two in a few days.” Without a backwards glance, I head out, itching to get away but eager to get back.

Fucking emotions.

I start my chopper and hit the open road, letting thepeace and cool air blow past me. Since we have a long ride, I have on a pair of jeans, long sleeved t-shirt and a leather jacket under my cut. I have my regular clothes in my saddle bag so I can change at the party.

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