Page 48 of We're Not Strangers Anymore

I let my rage take over and drive my fist into his face over and over again. I feel bones cracking and at this point I don’t know if they’re mine or his but I don’t stop. I beat him until he goes limp and the bathroom floor is covered in his blood.

I stand up, spitting on his lifeless body and before I can think I pull out my pistol, shooting him in the face until the magazine is empty. “Non scopare con la mia famiglia. Nonscopare con mia moglie.” I breathe heavily, leaving him there and making my way to Rowan. She’s sobbing quietly with her knees pulled to her chest.

“Row–”

“You said you’d never leave me alone again!” She cries. Her words hit me like a ton of bricks. She’s right.

I take the key to the handcuffs out of my pocket and quickly remove them from her wrist. I pull her into me, cradling her and she doesn’t pull away. Instead, she tucks her head into my chest with her arms wrapped around me. “I’m so,sofucking sorry, Row. I’m so sorry I left you cuffed with no way of running from them, I’m so fucking sorry I wasn’t here and that they did this to you. I promise, I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you.” I pull her head away from me just enough to inspect the gashes on her head and the bridge of her nose. I notice cigarette burn marks on her neck and collarbone and bruising that covers her bare legs.

“How long were they here?” I ask her.

“They got here right after you left.”

They’ve been doing this to her for almost half an hour.

“Did they– did they do anything else?” I ask, choosing my words carefully.

“No,” she answers, laying her head back into my chest.

I cup her face gently, feeling the heavy weight of guilt as I look at her. “I’m going to get my medical kit and stitch you up.” I whisper to her.

“No, don't leave!” She screams, sending her into a panic.

“Rowan, baby. It's okay, it’s just in the bathroom.” I say gently, holding her closer to me. Seeing her scared like this– it’s like a knife to my heart. I thought she was scared when I abducted her, but now I know she wasn’t, not like this.

“Take me with you, please.” She whispers, and I can see the hurt and fear in her eyes. Like her inner child is asking me to protect her. My heart sinks at the sight of her right now.

I scoop her up and carry her towards the bathroom. “Close your eyes,” I tell her before I enter. I don’t want her seeing the man I just killed on the floor. I grab the med kit and carry her to the guest bedroom, so that she doesn’t have to see all of this anymore. I shut the door with my foot and gently lay her down on the mattress but she clings to me, shaking.

“You can open your eyes, Row. It’s okay.” I whisper, brushing my thumb along her cheek.

I dip a rag into a cup of warm water, wringing it out before dabbing it on her cheek. She flinches and I immediately pull back, afraid of causing her more pain.

“Hold still,” I murmur, my voice softer than I intended. “You shouldn’t have to go through this. I should’ve protected you. It was my one job.”

Her eyes meet my gaze and a defiant smile plays on her lips. “It’s not your fault, I’ve been through worse.” She whispers, her voice raspy.

Her words sting, reminding me of everything she went through with Frank. I killed for her, but I should havetorturedevery single person who harmed her. “No. No one should have laid a hand on you. Ever.” I say, reaching for the antiseptic. I know she likes to make jokes about things that hurt her, but I can’t let her this time. I’m too fucking angry at myself for letting this happen. She should be just as angry at me. As I apply the antiseptic to a deeper cut on her forehead, she winces, sucking in a sharp breath.

I quickly withdraw my hand, guilt flooding my chest. “I’m sorry. I just need to clean it before I suture it.”

She shakes her head slightly and reaches out to touch my arm. “I’m okay,” she assures me gently. “Just a bit sore.”

For a moment, I just stare at her, the weight of everything I wanted to say before I got here hanging between us. “Did you mean what you said last night?” I ask, my voice barely above a whisper.

Rowan sits up, and places her hands in mine. “I love you. I mean it.” She whispers.

“Why? After everything I put you through–”

“You didn’t put me through anything. You saved me. And because, Grayson, I’m broken. But you seem to pick up my pieces and make me feel a little less broken. You’re filled with darkness but you save your light for me to see. I see the good in you, I see what other people can’t. I trust you, as much as I’ve said I don’t, I do.” She hesitates for a moment, looking down at our hands intertwined, then looks back up at me. “You’re what I’ve needed since I was nine years old. A safe space, someone to protect me.”

I feel a lump in my throat at her words. “But– I didn’t protect you the way I should’ve.”

“You did,” she cuts me off. “You killed my father. You killed those men. You brought me somewhere safe when I was in danger. Stop being hard on yourself over something you never even had to do in the first place.”

I look down, brushing my thumb along the back of her hand. “I can’t promise I’ll ever be good enough for you,” I say, my voice breaking. “But I promise I’ll try. I’ll never let you get hurt again, Row.”

Her eyes glisten with tears, and she smiles, a small, fragile thing that breaks my heart. “Just– stay with me. That’s all I need right now.”

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