Page 7 of Substitute for Love

“Like a serial killer?” a boy said, which earned him a shove and plenty of snickering.

“Yes. I mean, yes to the cutting into pieces part.” Unexpectedly, his voice cracked with the memory of having his own heart cut to pieces not so long ago. “Serial killers are something you’ll learn about in forensics class.” The students snickered, which helped distract him.

“If you cut the heart here,” he drew a line from top middle curve of the heart straight to the left, “and here,” he drew another line from the top middle curve to the right side of the heart. “Then… then you get…”

“Dumped,” one of the boys said, causing a ripple effect of laughter and a fist bump. Gabe pretended to laugh along with them, but inside was a different story.

To be honest, his heart hurt thinking about how literally every relationship in his life went bad. Why was he thinking about his love life now? Gabe didn’t usually think about that sort kind of stuff when he was in the classroom. What was different about today?

Oh yeah. The lovely Avery, er, Miss Williams.

“What do you get?” a student blurted, reminding Gabe to continue his lesson.

“Uh, okay. You get two halves of a circle. See?” he said, recovering with a cough.

“Ohhhhh!”

At least math worked out. His love life, not so much. More like a failed math equation.

Gabe must have done a good job hiding his sad memories, because the students didn’t seem to notice.

“So then,” he continued, “you have one whole circle, plus you’re left with a square.” He colored in the square. “Find the area of the circle and the square, and you’ll have your area of the whole heart. Easy peasy.”

Totally not easy, if you’re talking about a real heart.

He’d met his ex in early June. They had hit it off immediately. Her bubbly personality kept him coming back. It was the best summer of his life. Until it wasn’t.

Like he always did, Gabe went overboard—texting constantly, bringing flowers, physicality. He always went too fast. He couldn’t help it—he craved one-on-one connection. This time had been different, at least he thought at first.

They’d had so much fun, and she had seemed as interested in him as he was in her. Spontaneous lunches. Visits to the rock climbing gym and other physical places like that. All the energy made him think she was energetic abouthim.

Until Gabe realized how one-sided their relationship really was. Her feelings? Flirty and fake. His feelings? So over the top invested. Again. She had led him on and left him for some guy. Then she had played him off like he meant nothing.

As Gabe stared at the heart on the whiteboard, he made a promise to himself he would never let anyone else break his heart ever again.

Chapter 3: Gabe

Monday August 25, 11:05 AM

Second period went a lot like first period, followed by his prep period. Gabe waited for the bell to ring for the beginning of third period to start so the hallways would be clear. Then he headed to the office to make his daily visit.

“Ahh, Doreen. You saved the day with that muffin. Like always.”

Doreen’s eyes twinkled. “You are so welcome. My husband doesn’t even eat as many as you do.”

Gabe smiled as he leaned on the counter above Doreen’s station.

She smiled back, then fiddled with some paperwork on the desk. “I heard from another student today you’re his favorite sub. You know Mr. Tolman is retiring soon. Why not put your name in the hat?”

Gabe sighed slowly and with annoyance. “Doreen. We’ve talked about this.”

She sighed, exasperated, then stapled the papers. “Come on. We need more young teachers like you around here. If you get a full-time teaching job, I’ll bring you muffins every day.”

“You already do that,” he replied. “Anyway, you know why I can’t commit to anything right now.”

“Yeah, I know. When are you going to hear back about the fossil project? What was it?” Doreen rolled back in her office chair and filed the papers in a drawer.

“An archeological dig. In Egypt. My old college professor is trying to secure funding. He’s been working on this since Igraduated college. He’s getting really close. If it goes through, I’ll be out of here in a month.”

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