Page 59 of We Are All Sinners

“No, after she faked her own death, she went into hiding and had so much plastic surgery that she looks like a blow-up doll now. They never found any pictures of her at the place she was living,” he replies, keeping his eyes fixed on the road, avoiding my gaze.

“You saw them?” I ask, sensing I’m right.

“That’s where we were last night. You will be happy to know that Liam made sure that Boudreaux knew who he was being punished for. I also may have backhanded your egg donor, because mother, is definitely not the right word for her. Noah kind of electrocuted her too, but you know, she’s pretty much the devil. Just so you know, I normally would never hit a woman,” he adds, his voice steady. Honestly, I had a feeling that’s what they were up to in the middle of the night.

“Thank you for telling me, but why exactly would I be mad that you saw them and made her suffer a little?” I ask, a little confused.

I don’t understand why he is so nervous. He is gripping the steering wheel for dear life now, turning his knuckles white.

“There’s more. Just listen, okay, and keep an open mind.”

“Spit it out Brix! We promised no more secrets. It can’t be that bad.” I shake my head, getting more and more confused, the longer he doesn’t look at me.

“Your egg donor had other children. You actually have three brothers that we know of, so far. One is dead, one is about to die, and the other, believe it or not, appears to be a good guy. His name is Christian Devereaux, he was raised by his father after the age of four when the egg donor faked her own death. I’m sorry I haven’t told you about him until now, but I had to make sure that he is someone I would feel safe letting you go around.” He takes in a deep breath and lets it out, looking from me back to the road again several times.

I try to let what he said sink in. I have siblings. I guess I never thought about it. I mean, she gave me up so, wait, are they older or younger than me? Not that it matters, but I’m curious.”

“All of them are older than you. You also have a niece that lives with your brother. Her name is Magnolia June, but she goes by M.J. On the bright side, she is marrying a guy who has made it his mission in life to make Boudreaux and Vivian suffer for how they raised M.J. I haven’t met her, but I’m sure she would want to know her aunt.” His voice softens, letting me know that whatever these people did to that poor girl was pretty bad.

My mind is reeling with all the new information and I’m not sure what to say. Do I want to know these people. More importantly, can I trust these people.

“Is that everything?” I try to keep my voice calm, feeling like if there is more my brain might explode.

“Actually, there is one more thing. Please keep in mind that I chose to do this before I remembered you.” Brix’s voice is lower,and the way he keeps sweating, he looks like he could throw up any second.

“Jesus Christ! Brix, I’m not going to get mad at you. Have I yet? Fuck, relax before you give yourself a fucking stroke. I mean how bad can it be compared to what you have already told me?”

“Liam and I promised to give our sperm to a couple of our friends from college. There would be absolutely no sex involved. We already jizzed in our specimen cups, put it on ice, and as of this morning, the frozen package is on its way to Tallahassee for Nadia and Tasha to both go get inseminated. They are lesbians, and as you know in our organization, we have to procreate, not only to keep our titles, but to keep our lives. We just wanted to help them have the family they wanted. It also would have kept us from having to take a covenant. You know as well as I do that most Saints do not get to wait until they are almost thirty to marry. We were just doing what we thought was best. I hope you understand.” He finally looks at me and I can see how much this is weighing on him.

“I love you Brixon Blaze. The fact that even though you had selfish reasons, you also have the best of intentions to make sure those women never have to marry a Saint. They will never have to live a lie. I’m excited to meet them. How can a baby ever be something that I would ever be mad at?” I tell him knowing that a baby is the one thing that would give him something to live for.

I watch Brix visibly relax in his seat as he grabs my hand, bringing it to his lips, placing a soft kiss to my palm.

I take a deep breath, remembering that he isn’t the only one keeping a secret.

Will the ancestors punish me if I tell him? Technically, he already knows what the curse says about one of us dying.

I can’t keep this from him when he is trying to be open and completely honest when he didn’t have to be.

“So, since we are being open and honest about everything, I have something I have to tell you. I’m sorry that I have kept it from you for this long, but I was just trying to protect both of us. You know how it is with the whole personal gain thing.” I pause to take a breath.

“Evie, spit it out, it can’t be that bad, right?” Brix repeats the words I just spoke to get him to open up, giving my hand a squeeze for reassurance.

I wait for a vision or some sign that I should keep quiet, but nothing comes. Here goes nothing. I try to hide my watery eyes, but the words just won’t come.

Brix pulls the car over when he notices the tears streaming down my face. The pain in my heart resurfaces, as if a trigger has just been pulled on a gun that could take my life.

“I saw my death in the shop the first time you touched me. I haven’t been able to unsee it since,” I confess, struggling to catch my breath as sobs wrack my body.

“Who, baby? Who hurts you?” he asks, his voice filled with heartbreaking concern. “I would never let that happen; you know that. How do we fix this? I’m not losing you again!” The color drains from Brixon’s face as he locks eyes with me, his worry palpable.

“That’s what I felt that day, your death? No! No! This can’t be happening!” His voice echoes in the car as he cups my face, wiping a tear from my cheek.

“Yeah, but you don’t understand. I’ve already started trying to put the pieces together. It’s not me they are shooting at Brix, it’s you. I block the bullet from hitting you. Someone wants you dead, not me.” I try to explain as gently as I can, but how do you tell someone you ultimately die taking a bullet for them.

Brixon’s features visibly change from what I thought might be fear, to outright disbelief. He sits there for a minute just looking at me like I’m the most precious thing he has ever seen.

“Brix, I’m gonna need you to say something, anything, to let me know you are still with me.”

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