Page 63 of The Fate of Eternity

I’m pinned in place, watching the terrors unfold from a new angle, still incapable of making it all disappear. As if my thoughts are realized, I’m drawn closer, standing shoulder to shoulder with my younger self as Kenner takes off toward Nora.

Horror burns through me, but the scream that howls into the night isn’t mine; it’s hers—my smaller self.

The noise rattles the very air as the almighty blast of white light consumes my vision once again.

This is why it feels so familiar. It’s what I felt that night too.

Fuck.

I don’t know what any of this means.

Until the white light dims again, everything moves in slow motion, my worlds colliding as I charge toward Nora, both me now and me then, barreling toward her in a fit of rage. But I’m not the only one with my sights set on her.

There’s a boy. He’s barely taller than me, but he’s definitely faster. His eyes are narrowed, but not at Nora, at Kenner.

“Daddy, stop!” His plea rings in my ears and my body grows stiff.

Cassian.

“Stay back, Son.”

“No, Father. No!” he yells, getting closer to them as the child version of me glows.

I wasn’t blinded by the light… Iwasthe light.

I watch as I stutter, tumbling over my feet as I near the boy that I now know is Cassian, along with Nora. He stands between his father and my sister, fury etched into his features as he lifts his hands in protest.

“Out of my way, boy,” Kenner snaps, swiping at his son without care, sending him careening into the bushes that shelter us from the wind. “See to it that Orenda clears his memory of this night. No son of mine shall remember this moment and not believe in me,” he snarls, as malicious as ever, as I stumble the last few steps toward them.

The panic and need to protect them both doesn’t just swirl in my thoughts here, but the tingling in my bones tells me I felt it then, too. My smaller self leaps through the air just as Kenner gets within arms reach of Nora, pummeling me into her as my magic bursts from my body.

My scream turns into cries of horror as Kenner is blasted back, lost to the darkness as I lay in a crumpled heap on top of Nora. Magic oozes out of me in every direction, shimmering in bright lights as it connects with each wolf in the field.

Howls of pain echo in my ears as every wolf falls to the ground, stopping their assault on my father, Nora, and me.

The wind picks up as I try to stand, effectively knocking me back off my feet and onto Nora as I hear my father call out my name. By the third shout, the lights dim and my scream turns into a muffled whimper, that night playing out in high definition as I succumb to the hidden truths.

I reach them as soon as my father does, seeing the truth of that night through his eyes.

Nora is passed out beneath me as I groan and writhe to try and stand, but all I can do is blink up at my father with pitch-black eyes and black singed fingertips, waving for him to help.

Is this what happened? Is this what happened to me? Is this what I did?

I look down at my hands now, noting the lack of black tips as my father falls to his knees at my side. Blood gushes down his face, staining his skin as he soothes me.

“Oh, Addi. It’s okay. You’re okay, I’m here, I’m with you. It’s all going to be alright.” His words barely register in my mind as I stare, completely enraptured as he speaks to my younger self.

He rubs my hands with his, promising to take it all away as a soft glow washes over me again. I’m warm, happy, calm, and tingling with excitement, but I can’t process where it’s coming from. It’s like I’m feeling everything I felt then and forgot. I didn’t forget of my own accord, though. It was my father’s doing.

I watch as he repeatedly drapes his magic over me until my eyes are back to normal and my fingertips are no longer dipped in black ink. It’s then that he sees Nora, and it’s then that it’s clear it’s too late to prevent any serious damage.

Because he was saving me. From my own magic.

It’s heartbreaking and soul-shaking all at once. I see now what I never saw then, what my father shielded me from.

My darkness.

“You’re welcome.”

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