Page 40 of Stranded

Now that I’ve started wanting… I just can’t help myself.

I curl my fingers around his, and I hold on tight.

Chapter

Sixteen

RONAN

My belly isfull of delicious food, and the sun is sinking behind the trees.

It feels like we’re a million miles from anywhere, gazing out over the flat blue sea and the rising tide. Alph calls this place Brothers’ Cove. But it’s a perfect place for lovers, too. There’s plenty of room for both of us and the remnants of our picnic.

“Mm?” Alph offers me the wine bottle. It could feel tacky, drinking it without glasses, but instead it just fits the mood tonight.

“Mmhmm.” I take it and prop myself up on my elbow against the smooth stones.

Now and then, I’ll take his hand or he’ll let his hand rest on my thigh. Neither of us have leaned in for a kiss yet… but all it takes is one look in each other’s eyes to know that all our unspoken promises are still floating in the air between us.

Soon, I’ll finally discover what they mean.

I’m so contented just to exist in the here and now with Alph as the wine dwindles and the waves slowly rise to swallow the stony beach.

Sometimes one of us will say something, and we’ll talk for a while—about our pasts and our futures, or about something thatdoesn’t matter much at all. But it’s just as nice to be quiet. I don’t feel the need to chatter and show off and make dirty jokes.

I’m not trying to catch Alph’s eye and earn his attention. I’ve already done that—I’ve got him. Hook, line, and sinker.

“Hm?” I ask Alph, glancing over to offer him another turn with the wine bottle.

But he’s still propped up on his elbow, studying me intensely. He looks like he’s trying to plot a course on a map, desperately searching for a star or a landmark to figure out how to make sense of me.

And I get it.

Until he brought me to this place, I think there was something about him that I didn’t understand.

I’ve tumbled chaotically into Alph’s life, and now that I can finally relax… I’m starting to appreciate its pace. The tide comes and goes, one season slowly turns into another, and all things grow at the speed they’re supposed to.

Alph shakes his head to turn down the wine, and I shrug and take another sip. “How does this whole thing work? With your first collection and the runway showcase?” he asks instead.

It makes me feel so warm and fuzzy that he wants to know, and that’s an easy question. So I scoot back to sit cross-legged, leaning back against a boulder as Alph stays on his back to listen to me.

“Ideally, the work we did last year in the portfolio class is our foundation. But I’m scrapping the whole thing and starting from scratch.”

Alph’s eyes widen. “Seriously?” He isn’t saying it like it’s a bad idea—he’s just shocked.

“Yeah.” I smile. “The more I look at it, the more I realize what I was doing wrong.”

“What’s that?”

I sigh. “Compromising. I always run after what I want. But I was so afraid of ending up with nothing at all…” I trail off.

That I try to give other people what I think they want. I push myself right to the limit of what I can tolerate.

A roommate arrangement that gives me sewing space, even if it means they get a punching bag. A shirt that feels daring to me, but it’s still close enough to my family’s world that they’ll understand what it means. A hot rendezvous where I feel desired, but they don’t have to keep me around.

I look down at Alph, who just smiles gently at me, and suddenly the rising itch of discomfort settles down again.

“So.” I clear my throat. “I’d rather fail by taking a risk and doing something I’m proud of. Even if my roommates kick my ass and gloat about it later.”

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