Page 190 of Knot Their Omega

That I can express my feelings the correct way.

“I just wanted to be forgiven for Suzy’s death. To… tell Mom and Dad I’m sorry. To tell you, Nathaníel… that you’re still the best brother I could ever ask for… I… I’m just sorry, okay?”

“S-Stop talking like shit is going to end. We’re seconds awa?—”

The line suddenly drops, making me realize whatever units I had left are out. I look at the phone, realizing that’s all I’m going to be able to say to my brother and my ex-friends. It’s nostalgic when I think about it, but I guess this is the right thing to do.

Leaving the washroom, I’m back in the room, hovering over Astraea before I crouch down. She still looks miserable, but she’s not shivering as much. I take off my jacket, laying it on her, hoping it’ll give her a bit more warmth before I press the video button on my phone.

I notice the slight movement in her face, watching as her eyes barely open, fighting the heaviness of whatever drug they must have doped her up with.

“Shh,” I encourage, hoping to sound more like Nathaníel so she doesn’t panic. “Everything going to be okay, alright?” I whisper. “I’m gonna get you out of here.”

She looks confused, her brows meshing together, but there’s a haze of exhaustion that takes over the lines of her face, which tells me she’s going to fall unconscious any moment now.

“N-Na…” she tries to speak, which makes me give her a sad smile while my tears begin to fall once more.

“It’s okay. The others are going to be here and get you out, okay? Just sleep.”

She’s fighting the pull of the drug, but I know she won’t win against the heavy narcotic.

“Nathaniel,” she mutters, and for a moment, I dare to think she’s referring to me.The real me.

“Nathaníel,” I correct her and smile as I lean down and very lightly press a kiss to her forehead. “Sleep, Astraea. I’ll get you out of here. I promise.”

I see lines of defiance forming on her face, which is pretty funny and ironic to me, making me smile. I guess if this is the last time she sees me before I’m locked in prison for all eternity, she can remember me as the cocky asshole with the stupid grin.

“Nate,” she spits out the name, and I can tell she isn’t referring to my brother. “Nat…han…iel. Nate… Jr… Nate…” she repeats the different abbreviations of my name, but then she’s slipping away. “Don’t… go…”

“I’m not going anywhere,” I assure her while my tears end up falling onto her cheeks. “I’m right here. Until the end.”

Her lips part to say something, but her drooping eyes finally close, and I know she’s lost consciousness.

“Sorry, little rockstar,” I quietly whisper and press my forehead against hers. “I was too scared to try to claim you. Too frightened of the skeletons in my closet. Maybe… we would have faced them together, but… alas, I don’t think it was destined to end that way.”

Smiling with my resolution, I lean away and lift the phone so I can be in the frame of the recording.

“I don’t know what’s going to happen now… but I want to ensure you know… what a shining light you are. That… you shone so brightly, like the rockstar on stage you are, that I couldn’t let anything else happen to you.”

I smile to the best of my ability.

“I’m sorry, Astraea. I’m sorry, Icarus, Kenji, and Kai. I’m sorry to my twin older brother, Nathaníel, and my loveable parents. I’m sorry to all my fans who wanted to see me strive in this cruel world.” I let my tears fall. “Maybe if this world had more balance… where Alpha didn’t think Omega were but tools, and maybe if Omegas were given the chance and independence to pick those they truly love than forced into these relationships… maybe we’d finally live in a world that makes us happy. Makes us all equal.” I shrug.

“Until then… don’t become me. A sad rockstar who was too infatuated with fame to realize the damage he was causing to the world around him. Learn from my mistakes… and well… roar on, Blooming Nation.”

I end the video there, letting out a breath before I tuck the phone into the blanket, knowing it’s secured against Astraea’s chest.

“You done, bro?” Alvin calls out. “There’s a commotion. We’re gonna have to move bases!”

The door begins to wiggle, making Chris curse.

“Yo. The door is locked!”

“Bro! Open up! We gotta go!”

I rise up, turning to focus on the door that rattles against the lock. Reaching into my pocket, I pull out my lighter and the last cigarette in the box that I’ve been reserving for a moment like this.

Lighting it up, I take a few puffs, knowing this will probably be my last cigarette ever. I try not to think about it whileenjoying the burning taste between my lips before blowing out the smoke.