His hands take mine, and he squeezes gently. “Vixen, look at me.”
I lift my head and look him in the eyes. Those hypnotic hazel eyes, with swirls of gold and green always pull me in, and I'm lost in him. That's part of the problem, being able to be with him and not just be lost in him. This time I want to be myself with him, not someone who is willing to mold themselves into anything to stay in his orbit.
“I know I've done a lot to break your trust,” he continues speaking, “but I thought we were in a better place. Isn't that why we're moving in together?”
“I don't mean I don't trust you. I don't trust us. You and I have always broken down and hurt each other. I want to know that we are going to be able to do it better this time. Not just you, but me not falling into bad habits too,” I admit.
He nods a couple of times as he's letting what I said sink in. “Okay, I can understand that. And I do still believe I have a lot to make up to you. I think that's what you need to believe in us again. Looking back, you were never the problem. I realize that now.”
“That's not true,” I argue. “I let myself be intimidated. Other people and their agendas got in between us, because I didn't have enough fight in me to stand up for us. Also, I didn't come and talk to you first.”
He rubs his thumb on the top of my hands. “Maybe not the first time, but you have tried to talk to me, and I've shut you down. Don't beat yourself up like you messed everything up because your father threatened to have me thrown in jail. You gave up a lot to protect me and I threw it in your face. And now when I look back at it, you really didn't have a choice. Not until things had gotten squared away. There are so many things that could have been different. If Shane had spoken up and told me what was going on, or if my mother had said something about where you went.”
“Do you think that it's possible that we were too young before? I like to believe in fate or destiny. Before I didn't believe in soulmates, but you're my person. The only way I can rationalize everything we've been through is thinking that wasn't our time. We got together too soon, and this is when we were supposed to be together. Is that too cheesy?” I ask.
He doesn't answer me. Instead, he tugs me and kisses me slowly. He tastes like vanilla, coffee, and home.
“What do you want to do for the rest of the day,” he says after we finally come up for air.
“More of this would be nice,” I say and kiss him again.
Ford smiles against my lips. “I’m always up to spending the day wrapped up in you.”
I make a face. “Don’t you meanwith me?”
That naughty smirk I love makes an appearance right before he hoists me off my chair and onto his lap. “I said what I meant.”
Laughing, I swat him on the shoulder. “My mom is still in the house,” I whisper yell.
He groans and buries his head in the crook of my neck. “Right. Well, that’s like a bucket of cold water. It’s been a while since we’ve ever had to worry about parents being around.”
I raise my eyebrows and give him a look. “When did either of us have to worry about that?”
His fingers press harder against my skin, and his muscles stiffen underneath me. I know before he opens his mouth that the mood has shifted and he’s going to ask me something I probably don’t want to answer.
“At some point, I am going to want to talk about what happened the night we had dinner with my mom. No more running away, right?”
My tongue swipes across my bottom lip as I try and get my thoughts in order. “You’re right, I’m running, and it is because of what happened at dinner. I couldn’t deal with it, so I did what I do best, pulled up stakes and ran. But, this time I brought you along with me. I told you I wouldn’t run from you anymore, and I won’t.”
“So you asked me to run with you,” he states.
I nod, because that is exactly what I did.
“You know we have to stop running eventually,” he tells me gently.
“I know,” I whisper.
“Until then—” He kisses me. “I’ll keep pace with you.”
ChapterTwenty-Five
FORD
“Here, give me the last box,”I say and take it from Tessa.
She follows me inside, and I deposit the box onto the stack of other boxes we brought with us. Tess looks around the otherwise barren room. “We really need to get some furniture.”
“More than a mattress on the floor?” I tease her.