Page 52 of Pretty Broken Promises

“Ford? Honey, is something wrong?” my mom says instead of hello.

“Does something have to be wrong for me to call you?”

“No, but you never call, so I assumed—I’m sorry. Let me start again. How are you, honey?” she asks.

“I’m doing good. Really good, actually. Tessa and I are back together.” I’m not sure why I feel the need to make small talk with her.

“Are you happy?” she asks, and there’s no hidden agenda I can detect. She might be neglectful and often operating in survival mode, but she isn’t purposefully cruel.

“I am. I love her.”

“Then hold on tight and never let go. So, you’re graduating soon with your AA, right? What do you have planned next?” she changes the subject.

“That’s actually why I’m calling. I’ve gotten a scholarship to Cascade University in Seattle. My high school coach is the head football coach there, and he wants me to be the starting quarterback. Tessa and I are moving right after graduation.”

“Am I going to get to see you before you leave?” Her voice is quiet, and I barely hear her.

“I’m surprised you want to. It’s not like we spend a lot of time together. I haven’t seen you once in the last couple of years,” I point out.

“I know, and I’m sorry. You have always deserved better. I’ve failed you in so many ways, but at least let me take you and Tessa to dinner before you leave. Not to make up for anything, I know nothing I say or do can do that, but maybe we can start over from here?” she asks, with a hopeful note in her voice.

I want to be able to reassure her that we can start over. When I was a kid I’d have moved mountains to make her happy. Seeing my mom smile was rare, and I did everything I could to bring one out. She’s never made me a priority the way I always have her. Tessa has a new mantra, “learn to love the things that are good for you.” I’ll always love my mom, but I need to love myself more because she never will.

“I’ll check with Tess. I can’t promise she’ll be comfortable with it. It’ll just be you, right?” I check.

“I won’t even tell Wendell. It’ll just be the three of us,” she promises.

“No promises, I’ll talk to her and let you know.” I end the call and stare out at the mountains. I can’t help but feel like I’ve made a giant mistake by leaving the door open for my mom, even just a crack.

ChapterTwenty-Two

TESSA

I turnside to side looking at myself in the mirror on the back of the door. The dress I pulled out of the closet is a forest green wrap dress with long sleeves that falls past my knees. It’s probably the fourth or fifth dress I tried, but all of them were either too short or too tight. For some reason, I want Ford’s mom to like me, even if her opinion doesn’t mean anything to him.

A light rap against my door pulls my attention away from the mirror. I stroll across the room and open the door, then close it again. Shane doesn’t take the hint and comes in anyway.

“I owe you an apology,” he begins.

My eyes shift over to him, and my face says everything I refuse to verbalize. One look tells him how lame and underwhelming this is starting out.

He leans against the wall and tips his head back. “When I told you I was going to help you with Ford, I meant it, but then you were gone and he fell apart. I told myself it was better if you just stayed gone.”

“But you’re the one who called and brought me back,” I remind him.

“Please, you were miserable.”

I give him a pointed glare. “Let’s not pretend you asked me to come back here for my benefit. You wanted to ruin Ford’s relationship with Jen, and you knew bringing me back would do that. Nothing you’ve ever done has been for my benefit, and that’s okay. Ford is your friend, not me. It only makes sense that you’d be loyal to him. But, you didn’t even do that. You have to see now that I am what he needs, so why didn’t you do what was best for him and help us get back together?”

“I planned to, but I thought he was doing better with you gone. At least for a while. Your dad could have ruined Ford’s life. As it was he who put him in a situation that ruined his chances to play pro ball.”

I make a face. “Your apology sucks.”

“Yeah, none of that came out right. I guess I felt threatened by you. You’re the only person who has ever pulled his attention away from our friendship. I’ll admit I called you to come back for selfish reasons, but also because by then I could tell he was faking being fine. If he couldn’t feel something for someone as amazing as Jen, I knew he’d never get over you.”

I inhale slowly through my nose. “And yet you still didn’t do anything to help. You’ve backed him up for every lie he’s told about me, and what’s worse you let him believe them himself. What is the point of this apology? You don’t sound sorry. I’m not going to take him away from you any more than Jen has taken you away from him.”

“But you are taking him away. He’s following you to Seattle.” Shane is starting to get heated.

---