Page 19 of Pretty Broken Promises

As if we conjured him, Ford steps into the kitchen. There's a looseness in the way he's carrying himself that wasn't there earlier, like a giant weight has been lifted off of him. He walks straight for me and puts his hands on either side of my legs caging me in where I sit on the counter.

I hold my breath for a second, waiting for the panic to set in. Ford doesn't know that I react that way now when someone touches me or gets too close. So far only Benji has been able to get close to me, but I find that I'm not panicking. I exhale and relax.

Ford turns his head to the side and studies me. I can tell he's curious about my wariness, but he doesn’t say anything. “Did you want to go and do something?”

My eyes open wide and latch onto Jen silently begging her for help. She catches on immediately and doesn't let me down. “Oh, I'm sorry Ford. I was just talking to Tessa about doing something. But it wasn't like a girls’ night. I was saying how nice it is that everybody is paired up now, and we can all go out on a group date. You've never gotten to join us on those and I was saying to her how fun it would be.”

Ford narrows his eyes. I don't think he's buying the group date scenario. “Name one time there has been a mass group date.”

“Well, we haven't had one because you were single, and now you're not so we can go,” she says.

He makes a face at her. “Mmhmm, tell me, what activity were we going to do on this group outing?”

Jen being a master at lying to Ford doesn't miss a beat. “Bowling, pizza, and beer.”

Shane pops his head around the corner. “Woman, did I hear you say beer?”

“And bowling and pizza,” she adds.

“Sweet,” Shane says. “When are we doing this?”

“Tonight after Raven gets back from class,” Jen says.

“This is going to be so much more fun now that nobody's single,” Shane says as he walks out of the room.

Jen throws her hand out to where Shane was just standing as if to say, “See.”

“Can we do it another night? Tessa and I literally just got back together. It would be nice to have one night to ourselves,” Ford argues with her.

She shrugs her shoulders as if it's out of her hands. “I already reserved a couple of lanes.”

I give her a look, and she mouths, “Sorry,” to me. I need to say something quick.

“You know it actually sounds like fun. And to be honest, I've always been kind of jealous the few times we've all hung out and everybody was paired up. It would be kind of nice to join in that way. Also, I think we should take it slow. It's been two years. We don't need to jump right back into the middle of a relationship. I think we have to start over from the beginning. Which for us started with us hanging out in a group of friends.”

“Actually, I believe it started with us arguing and being at each other's throats,” he grumbles.

I smirk. “I'd say we're right on track then.”

He takes both of my hands in his large ones, and stares right into my eyes. It's hard not to spill every secret I have while I'm staring into his green-gold gaze, but somehow I resist. “Are you sure this is what you want? You want to go bowling? The girl from the fancy side of the tracks wants to wear rented shoes and throw a ball down a wooden lane. That's what you want to do tonight?”

“Don't forget there will be beer and pizza,” I remind him.

He nods. “Yep, the cheapest beer, and basically cardboard with cheese on it.”

I shrug. I've definitely had worse. “Sounds like any night I let Tracy pick the restaurant. See, this is why we need to take it slow. You know the old Tessa. You don't know a whole lot about this version of me. You've seen bits and pieces, but you don't know a whole lot about my life since I gave up my trust fund. Do you even know what kind of car I drive?”

He shoves his hand through his hair, a surefire sign that he isn't quite sure. “Uh, I think it's silver.”

“It is. At least mostly. Is there any harm in taking our time?” I push.

“No. If I say what's on my mind right now, you're going to slap me. I don't want to sound like a pig and make you think all I care about is sex, but?—”

I hold up my hand and cut him off. “I'm pretty sure you probably shouldn't finish that statement. I am not ready.”

“And that is not what I was going to say. It isn't even sex, I mean yeah I miss that, but I just want to feel close to you again. I want to hold you as I fall asleep, and I want to wake up knowing that you're still there.”

I chew on my bottom lip. “Well, that is a little bit better. Marginally. But like I said, there's a lot of stuff you don't know about me anymore, Ford.”

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