Page 17 of Pretty Broken Things

My face burns with embarrassment. There’s no reason any of these people should stand up for me. I’ve been an oblivious and spoiled bitch to most of these people, too lost in my own pain to recognize I wasn’t alone in my misery. “He’s right. They don’t owe me anything,” I mumble against his chest.

“Fuck that,” he snarls. “She’s one of us now.”

“You can’t just declare that and make it true,” the skinny guy states.

Shane stands up, looking every bit as menacing as Ford does. “Wanna bet, Craig? Do you want to go against Ford and me?”

Tracy stands up next. “They’re right, Tessa is one of us now, and we look out for our own.”

A shiver races up my spine. I can feel the tide shifting, and somehow I know deep down that the course of my life will never be the same.

Shane moves close to me when someone steals Ford’s attention. “I hope you are ready for this, Tess, because when Ford claims someone, it’s forever. Him saying you’re one of us now, that’s for life, not just for this school year. If you can’t handle that, you best go make up with those two-faced friends of yours.”

I look deep into his crystal blue eyes. “You’re saying we’re family now, all of us?”

He nods, and I smile for the first time today. “I haven’t had a family for a long time.”

“Well, you’ve got one now, whether you want us or not,” Shane says. I don’t know if he’s comforting me, or warning me. Probably both.

* * *

The restof the day is fairly uneventful. After Ford’s decree the rest of the Parkers rally around me, or at least act as a buffer between me and my former clique, so instead of continuing to physically assault me they regress to just being passive aggressive. I’m ashamed to admit, even if just to myself, that it bothers me.

They didn’t care about me. That’s a hard pill to swallow. While I know my friendship with Brandie and Erin was flawed, I naively assumed it was somewhat genuine. Maybe my friendship with Brandie can be salvaged, but time will tell about that.

The three of us had been going to school together since kindergarten. Our mothers were all socialites who shopped and lunched together. As superficial as it might be, they were still the ones I turned to when my mother dipped out of my life. They are making me feel easily discarded, like I did when my mom left.

What was it about me that made it so easy for people to cast me aside? My father didn’t want to be around me, my mother didn’t care enough to even call me, and my friends just walked away without even a moment of hesitation. When someone abandons you once, it’s easy to blame them. When many people leave you, over and over, it’s hard not to look inward for blame.

“You’re thinking way too hard for three in the afternoon.” Lydia leans against my locker, and gives me the look that says I can talk to her if I want. She’s not pushy, not very emotional at all really, but she tries and that’s something.

“Hmm,” I evade. Deciding to ignore my own birthday, and actually being able to forget about it are two different things. It also leaves me without much to say to her. She wants to know why I’m thinking so hard, and I don’t think she’s expecting me to unload a lifetime of parental neglect and disappointment on her. I’m not really in the mood to dwell on it myself.

She rolls her eyes. “Talk. Don’t talk. I’ve got enough problems of my own, so if we’re not going to focus on yours then maybe you can help me with mine.”

Now, this I can do. A diversion sounds pretty fucking awesome actually. “I can see those devious wheels turning in your head. I’m guessing you’ve got a plan, and I’m part of it. What do you need?”

Her lips twist as she fights a laugh. “You’d think you’d known me longer than you have. Okay, you’re right. What I need is to make that bitch back the fuck off Shane.” She points down the hallway where the guys are talking to a couple of girls, without concern she’s making somewhat of a scene.

My heart dips watching Ford flirt with one of the girls from the pep squad who was faking being my friend up to a few days ago. It’s apparently only a social faux pas to talk to Ford and Shane if you befriend them, but totally acceptable if you only plan to fuck them.

Inhaling slowly, I try and shove down the burning jealousy swelling in my chest. I have no claim to him. Just because we’ve been hanging out the last week doesn’t mean we’re becoming anything more than friends. Not once has he made a move on me, or said anything that could be misconstrued as a come-on. Still, the intensity of his attention, when it’s wholly focused on me, is like a drug.

“You know he hasn’t hooked up with Tracy since the night you saw them at the Grand, don’t you?”

My eyes reluctantly pull away from them to focus on her. I shrug, like I don’t care, but I’m secretly relieved. There’s still the matter of Mandi and Kaitlyn to deal with, but I don’t want to be friends with either of them. At least not anymore.

“Should I give him a gold star that he’s managed to be abstinent for a few days in a row?” I ask sarcastically.

Lydia shrugs, completely unfazed by my mood swings. “When you’re offered as much string free sex as he is, twenty-four hours is remarkable self-restraint.”

Ford smirks down at Mandi, and gives her the look I’ve seen him give others in the past. The one that says he’s available to play. His eyes are hooded, and his thumb drags slowly along his lower lip. Somehow, I think he’s getting ready to end his apparently impressive streak of abstinence.

Shane is more obvious with his flirting. He tugs on Kaitlyn’s long blonde curls and brushes one behind her ear. His smile is wider, showing his dimples. There are few women who easily resist Shane McKinnick’s charm. In fact, Tracy and I seem to be the only ones, but that’s probably because we’re both drawn to the dark vortex that is Ford Shaw.

I don’t know what Lydia’s plan is, but I can see by the look on her face she has something up her sleeve. “I’m probably going to regret this, but what is your plan?”

A devious smile pulls at her lips. “How do you feel about hanging around football practice?”

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