Page 38 of Peaceful Chaos

"That isn't exactly true. Remember what Natalie said?" I remind her.

"I was only about two then, and you were only four or five?"

I reach out and play with the blue dyed ends of her hair. "I had a dream, or it might have been a memory. It was the night I got this." I run my other hand across the jagged scar on my side. "Whenever I remember that night, even as hard as I try not to, there's a huge gap in time and the details are fuzzy. I remember him cutting me, and then I just remember standing over him, covered in blood, with a knife in my hand. But this time there was more."

She takes the hand that's still stroking my scar. "What else did you see?"

I swallow hard. There's been years and so much bloodshed in between the boy I was and the man sitting here now, but that was the moment my life changed forever. "He was the first person I ever killed, did I tell you that?"

Raven crawls closer to me and onto my lap. She takes my face in her hands and manages to shut out the rest of the world. "Tell me about the dream," she repeats.

"It was more like a memory. I was tied spread eagle on the floor of the basement. I had been beaten and stabbed that night. Not because I was fighting, but because one of Damien's clients enjoyed hurting me. He got off on it. No one came for me, and I was sure I was going to die there. Honestly, until tonight I had no idea how I didn't die in that basement, especially since a big part of me wanted to."

"I'm glad you lived to find me," she whispers.

I freeze. "Say that again."

"I'm glad you lived to find me," she repeats. "What does that mean to you?"

"In my dream you were there. You came down the stairs, and found me when no one, not even Lucien bothered to help me. He stitched me up, but he left me down there tied to the floor. You came to me and cut one of the ropes. I heard a noise and begged you to leave so you'd be safe. You handed me the knife and told me to live and come find you."

Her hand drops from my face and covers her mouth. "As you can see from tonight, I used to sleepwalk. It was pretty bad. I'd wake up in strange places. Sometimes I'd remember bits of what I did while I was sleeping, but not enough to retrace my steps. I don't remember ever coming to Blackthorne Manor before I was eighteen though."

I look at the clock and see it's two in the morning. Lucien is going to be pissed if I wake him up, but I need to know. Leaning back, I snag my cell phone off the charger on my nightstand. Raven puts her hand over mine, trying to stop me from dialing. "Sin, it's late. Talk to him tomorrow."

I shake my head. "No, I have to know."

She lets go and I select Lucien's name from my favorites. "What the fuck do you want right now?" he barks.

"Sorry to wake you," I say. I'm not sorry, but that seems like the appropriate response. Not that I've ever given a shit about stuff like that before.

Lucien groans, and I know at least I didn't wake him up. "Not sleeping, asshole, but you're ruining my blow job."

If just calling is ruining his fun, he's going to fucking hate the next words out of my mouth. "The night I was stabbed and you stitched me up, how did I get free?"

"Really? You need to ask me this now?" He pulls the phone away from his mouth. "Sweetheart, go play with Ted for a bit."

"You are a bunch of freaks," I chuckle. It's actually pretty tame in the history of some of his exploits.

"You're the one who wants to talk about blood and death. Shouldn't you be doing unspeakable things with my sister?And by that I mean I never want to speak to you about them, just so we're clear."

"Luce, will you just tell me what I need to know?"

"I thought you freed yourself."

I sigh. "I was tied to the floor in the basement. Someone came down and cut me free. Who would have done that?"

"I would have if I'd known they tied you up. You weren't when they let me stitch your side closed. My father and his buddy certainly wouldn't have done it. The only other person at the house was—"

"Who, Luce? Who was the other person at the house?"

"Raven. That's why I wasn't down with you. I was trying to keep her upstairs away from the people Damien had over, but once she fell asleep I left her room."

"That's what I needed to know," I tell him and go to hang up.

"Thanks a lot, fuckface. Talking about my sister was a real boner killer."

"Go watch Ted and Amber, I'm sure that will wake the dead," I tell him and hang up.

I set my phone down and turn my attention back to Raven. "You were there. Don't you see what this means?"

"That I have massive memory loss?"

"No." I tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear so I can look in her eyes without the obstruction. "You were my protector first. What we have isn't rushed. It's been building our entire lives. You are my destiny, not my responsibility. I'll never grow sick of you, or regret marrying you. How could I when I have been fighting most of my life to find you?"

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