Page 83 of Pretty Monsters

Just uttering those words, as little detail as I shared made me feel dirty. Used. I vowed I'd never feel that powerless ever again.

"Is that why you bound my hands?"

I nod. Even that was me trying to curb my urges to completely own her. She doesn't deserve that. Her entire life has been under the control of someone else.

Raven groans, and drops her head back against the wall with a thud. "I'm so pathetic. The feminist in me wants to rail against you and tell you to fuck off."

"It sounds like there's a but coming."

She chuckles, but there's no humor in the sound, only resignation. "But, I feel like I'll die if you don't touch me. I can't even muster up the will to deny you."

"What are you saying?" Can she really forgive me?

"I'm saying that I'd like to try."

"You don't know what you're getting into. When I'm stressed I need the release. I use sex to do that, and I'm not gentle."

"I'd like to try, but on one condition," she begins.

"What is it?" I stop breathing waiting for her to accept this fucked up situation.

"It's only me. I meant what I said before, I won't put up with there being other women."

Running my knuckles across her cheek, I'm surprised by the tenderness I still feel. "I don't want anyone else. I need you to understand that sometimes I'll be cold. Feeling anything is new to me, and I'm still fighting the urge to shut it all off."

"Then I'll just have to figure out how to help you turn them back on."

Stepping back, I grab her hand. "Come on. I need to check the trackers on the computer and see if there's any new communications. I'm not letting you out of my sight while the threat from your father is getting closer."

"Whatever you say, master," she teases.

I swat her ass, and she squeaks. "We don't need to take it that far. You're mine, and I do need to be in control, but I don't own you. I'd never let you feel like a possession."

"You're better at this than you think," she comments.

Smirking, I warn her, "Let's see if you still think that when I tie you up and fuck you later."

"Mmmm," she hums. "Why is it you think that's a threat?"

27

Letting Go

Raven

Anger,confusion, lust, and love fight for dominance over my emotions. My pride wants me to refuse him, to turn my back on him and walk away. I think about it, but it occurs to me that all I'd be left with is my pride.

If I have to sacrifice a bit of my dignity to feel his arms wrap around me at night, to surrender to the bliss only he can provide, then so be it. Anger is a much different and more difficult feeling to push aside. As mad as I am, it still doesn't push aside the love that has wormed its way to the very bottom of my soul.

I catch up to Sin in the gym, and see Jen and Shane trying to manage the struggling redhead.

"You don't have a right to keep me here." She scratches at her arms, and it's clear she's been doing it for a while. Deep scratches mar her porcelain skin, some of them deep enough they might scar.

"We're going to have to restrain her or sedate her. She's causing damage to herself," Jen intervenes.

Jess struggles harder. "No!" she shrieks. "I told you I don't want to stay here. This is kidnapping!"

Jen looks conflicted. A deep crease has formed between her eyes, and as much as she wants to help her friend, she knows what we all do. You can't force someone to heal.

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