Page 83 of The Vampire King's Victory

Caemorn looked up at him. “You are worried that this part of me returning will make me want to do those things to you?”

“A little. I’d rather you didn’t want to--”

“I won’t. But this darkness is a part of me,” Caemorn told him. “But I promise you that it will never touch you or Christian again.”

Balthazar slowly nodded. He felt Christian agree with his decision.

“All right, I believe you. I trust you,” Balthazar said. “Let’s end this.”

WHOLE

Before Balthazar could control Roan-Kaly and rewire him to join Caemorn, Julian and Daemon appeared just a few feet from all of them, using the Wyvern power to teleport from the lake to the tower in less than a second. Christian wondered if Daemon had Julian teleport them like he’d made Christian’s best friend do for them.

Julian would not have been so useless against Roan-Kaly, I think. He has gotten so strong already,Christian thought, angry at himself for not protecting Balthazar from the toxic memories that Roan-Kaly had been using against him. Instead, falling prey to them himself, distracting Balthazar when he needed to be focused.If Caemorn had not been there to anchor Balthazar… things might have gone differently.

Julian’s head snapped towards Christian and his best friend rushed over to him. Julian didn’t wait for Balthazar to release Christian to take him into his arms, but just hugged them both with evident relief.

“Julian! Daemon!” Christian answered back with more emotion than he meant to let on. But he still felt a little fragile after the assault of memories and wanted these two people who exuded such strength and purpose.

“Christian, Balthazar,” Daemon said softly and with more than a little affection.

Daemon lightly pressed a hand on his and Balthazar’s shoulders before moving onto Arcius, Fiona and Caemorn to greet them as well with that silent, but powerful communication. Christian immediately felt Balthazar relax. He did as well. The Vampire King’s powerful personality surrounded them all and re-established a feeling of rightness and order. Things had onlyseemedout of control and terrible, but now everything was as it should be. They’d made it through to the other side. The flames were still purple. Christian frowned at that, but Julian’s voice drew his gaze away from the fire.

“Are you guys okay? Oh, my God, I was so worried! Daemon said it would be all right and we had to stay back but…” Julian pulled back from the hug and cupped both Christian and Balthazar’s faces. “I felt this pain… what happened?”

Christian opened his mouth, but nothing came out. The pain had been something he would never be able to forget. Balthazar, of course, didn’t wish to remember it. He wanted it to remain in the past. Christian could feel his Master shoving those memories into a dark hole, wanting to be in the moment, and to look forward to the future.

“It’s all right, Julian. We vanquished him. Look. See!” Balthazar gestured towards Roan-Kaly’s unconscious body. “I took him out, Daemon! I know you’re not surprised, but--”

“I see, Eyros, and, no, I am not surprised. I know your great strength even if you are not so sure of it,” Daemon answered with a nod and smile.

Christian met the Vampire King’s eyes and he saw that Julian hadn’t been the only one to experience Balthazar’s pain that wasn’t on that tower. Despite the Vampire King’s calming words, Daemon’s expression was haunted for a moment. Christian was sure he was mentally jotting down yet one more thing his longsleep had allowed to happen. What had it cost him to keep Julian and himself away while this fight took place?

He wants to protect us. To shelter us. But if he does then the damage can’t be repaired,Christian realized.Facing Roan was something that Balthazar needed to do without Daemon’s help. And Caemorn had to see it, too.

Christian watched from the safety and security of Balthazar and Julian’s arms as Caemorn got down on his haunches above Roan-Kaly. Daemon had checked in with Arcius and Fiona before he came up behind Caemorn. He did not touch the Kaly Vampire, but the sympathy on his face showed he wished to comfort Caemorn. But would Caemorn allow it?

From the tension in his shoulders, the stiff way he moved, the deliberate not meeting of any of their eyes told Christian that Caemorn was suffering and when he suffered he drew inwards. What Christian had seen and experienced from Balthazar’s mind had shown him that Roan-Kaly was more than dangerous. He had done unspeakable things to Balthazar and the others. Previously, Christian had no idea how bad it had truly been and he was certain that Balthazar would never have shared that with him or anyone. But now all on this rooftop had a very good idea of why Balthazar had taken the extraordinary step to kill Roan-Kaly. And now, he was being asked to repair him and send him into Caemorn, his good friend.

Caemorn’s shoulders drew forward as if he were beetling in on himself the longer he touched Roan-Kaly. Christian could feel the toxicity of the Kaly-slice that resided in that body. It was so much worse than all the others.

Are you sure you want to do this, Caemorn? Take Roan back inside of you?Christian asked, using the name “Roan” and not adding the hyphenate. “Roan” was not Kaly, was certainlynotCaemorn. Time had twisted Roan into something else.

It is a part of me, Christian,Caemorn disputed those thoughts. Gently, but firmly. Roan-Kaly’s acts are ones I must atone for, because it was a part of me that did these things to Balthazar and the rest of his House. How could I have been so blind not to see what was going on? Not to sense myself in this--

There’s darkness in everyone, Caemorn, but to suggest that if you plucked that part from anyone, set it loose, and made it insane that it IS the same as them, is simply wrong.Christian mentally shook himself.I’m sorry, but no, these aren’t your acts and you aren’t responsible for them! Balthazar would tell you that himself if he was asked!

Balthazar should not give me forgiveness. He has suffered enough,Caemorn said firmly.Do not ask him.

Christian wanted to object, but Caemorn sent him a firm “no”. If Christian respected him and loved him, he would not do this. The love part Caemorn hadn’t intended to reveal, but it was there. He tensed as if waiting for Christian to tell him that “love” for something like him was impossible.

That’s not true, Caemorn,Christian told him.Surely, you can feel how much the people here love you. Daemon is right there. Right behind you.

Caemorn shrank down more. Julian was looking between Christian and Caemorn. He knew that they were talking, but not about what.

The only truly safe place for this creature to be is back inside me,Caemorn answered.It will never get out again. It will never be free. That I can assure both you and Balthazar.

And Christian felt how much the Kaly Vampire meant this. Caemorn would ensure that he never allowed this aspect of himself to affect anyone again. Caemorn rolled Roan-Kaly over. He was still unconscious. So deeply away from the world that he didn’t even moan.

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