Page 41 of The Spy Ring

FOURTEEN

Jagger

“Four agonizing days,”I said.

It’s only been four days since I ended everything with Tiffany and it’s felt like four hundred. I knew this would be hard but the lack of sleep and everything reminding me of her surprised me.

“And how does that make you feel?” Dr. Randy Tenner asked.

I rolled my eyes. That’s all the man did, asked how anything made me feel. He got all that schooling to obtain a degree so he could ask people how they felt.

“Terrible. But it was the right thing to do.”

“Interesting.” He nibbled on the tip of his pen before he pushed it to the pad of paper in his lap, scribbling something down.

“It put the case at risk, not to mention Tiffany and David.” I curled my fingers into the arms of the black leather chair. He must have bought this himself because I couldn’t fathom the government forking over money for a nice piece of furniture like this.

“And that concerns you? Putting those two at risk.”

“Of course. I’m not an unfeeling monster. It was my mistake, and they shouldn’t have to pay for it,” I said letting go of the arm of the chair and running my fingers through my hair.

“And besides, it’s not like I’m in love with Tiffany. It hasn’t even been a month since I’ve gotten to know her—”

“What about Las Vegas?” The doctor cut me off. “Didn’t you get to know her then too? That was almost two months ago.”

“That doesn’t count.” I waved my hand at him, blowing air through my lips.

“But you married her. How do you marry someone, even if you just met, without some kind of spark? Knowing something about them that makes you decide to spend the rest of your life with them.”

Now he suddenly puts his degree to use. Not that I wanted him to. He should be jumping up and shaking my hand. Explaining that he must go tell my boss that I should be honored for my courage. How I put this agency first instead of my heart.

Why can’t he just tell me what I want to hear?

“She told me some things about her. But I think I married her because I was drunk,” I said picking at a piece of thread protruding from the seam of my pant leg.

“You weren’t drunk enough to not remember. You told me she blacked out, but you remember everything. Even how you felt when she put your father’s ring on your finger,” he said flipping back a few pages in his notepad.

I should have known it was a bad omen to use that ring. Nothing good ever came from that man.

“Yes, I remember it, but that doesn’t mean I fully grasped the severity of the situation.”

“Perhaps not, but you knew the risk of getting involved with a woman to that degree. Maybe, deep down, you really wanted to be married,” he said.

I stopped fidgeting. My eyes lifted to the round government issued clock above Dr. Tenner’s head on the sterile white wall behind him.

“Oh look, my time is up. Thank you, Dr. Tenner, for your help. You will make a note in my report to Ms. Chester that I am no longer in Tiffany and David Blackburn’s life.”

I stood and glanced down at his notes hoping to see what he wrote. But he flipped over the cover and tossed it onto the small table between us before I could see.

I almost made it to the door before he said, “Yes, I will. But Agent Chance, if I could say one thing before you go . . .”

Sighing, I turned toward him and nodded.

“Who will be there to hold your hand when you are in the hospital? Tiffany . . . or this job?”

“What makes you think I will be in the hospital?” I asked, confused by the morbid turn of his words.

“It’s hypothetical. If or when you need to be in the hospital, who would be there for you. I don’t think a job can hold your hand or make you soup when you are sick. But a person who cares for you can.”