Page 8 of Dirty Secret

"It's kind of sad how obvious it is. I felt bad. I'm your best friend. I can't watch you turn into some creepy hag who watches men through cracks in her curtains and fantasizes about what won't be."

I frowned. He was right, of course, but how could I tell him that I had already turned into that hag?

"I thought you were my friend?"

He tore his sight from the sandwiches and leaned toward me. "I am your friend. That's why I'm here, Heidi. I love you. I want to see you happy, not held back by your parents, or worse, in some loveless marriage to a man who's only guided by political ambition. Some man your parents picked out for you. I have to be honest, I can totally see that happening."

His words sunk to the bottom of my stomach with a sharpness that caused me to wince. "Happiness doesn't come from a man."

"No, it comes from being free," he shot back.

He needed to stop. Where was my funny and sometimes pushy friend? He was being too serious for my liking.

I cleared my throat. "My creepiness is not the reason I asked to meet you at Bake & Takefor lunch. I wanted to apologize about my father. I am assuming he is forcing you to take me to the gala?"

His spine straightened as his fingers started to massage the bread on top of one of the sandwiches. Felipe's actions told me I was right. My father couldn't do anything without bribery playing a part.

"I had a date for the gala. Now I will have to cancel it. This is a guy who is important to the firm. Someone I really don't want to dismiss. No offense, Heidi, you're my friend and I love you, but this guy is important."

"I thought you only wanted men, not guys." The smile from my little tease faded as I realized I'd made a mistake.

Felipe brought the sandwich to his mouth and inhaled it. One moment it was there, crumbs falling from his hands, and the next, it vanished. Not just that, he was picking up another sandwich square to replace the one he lost down his throat.

Felipe was a casual eater, only consuming enough that would be appropriate, especially in public. But when something was bothering him, he turned into a food vacuum.

"He's a man where it counts." Felipe words garbled with the sandwich filling his mouth. He swallowed before continuing, "Look, Heidi, he's not just important to the firm . . . but to me as well."

My eyes widened at his admission. "Are you two dating?"

Felipe only dated once, when he was a freshman at Georgetown. It ended badly. The guy, Eric, used my friend. He posted personal things on social media to humiliate Felipe, and it worked. Since then, Felipe hasn't had had a relationship with a man. Not because he didn't want to. Somehow Eric would find out and contact the guy Felipe was dating to scare him away.

He fondled the third sandwich square. I wondered if he would open his mouth with an answer or just to fill it with more bread and meat.

He did both.

"Yes, but no one can know about that, Heidi," he said before placing the entire sandwich into his mouth.

I clasped his hand.

"Felipe, of course, I won't say anything. You're my friend. But you only give Eric the upper hand by allowing yourself to be controlled like that."

He was silent for a moment. I could only hope my words made sense to him.

"What about you, Heidi? Aren't you allowing your father to control you, too?" Felipe paused while reaching for the fourth sandwich and stared up at me. His chocolate-brown eyes melted in sorrow.

I was about to deny and defend myself, but I couldn't do that with a lawyer. He had spent years in school learning how to knock my argument down with a puff of breath.

"Maybe I am, but he's my father. You can at least avoid Senator White if you want. I am forced to share blood with the man."

What a pair we were.

"But you aren't a child anymore. He can't dictate who you see or screw around with. He would never destroy his daughter because that would make him look bad."

I smirked. "He would never directly hurt me, Felipe, but he knows lots of people who would do it for him."

I picked up the last sandwich, saving my friend from his gluttony. As I stared at the food between my fingers, I wondered if it could solve this hollow ache in my chest before I shoved it into my mouth. A BLT with some spice. My mouth watered at the flavor and as I chewed, there was disappointment that it would never be filling.

The small wrinkle under Felipe's right eye appeared, which told me his lawyer brain was churning away. "What if we go to the gala together but don't at the same time?"

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