Page 72 of Tell Me Lies

“You can!” she cries out. “And, yes, I did, but Walker didn’t,” she says quickly. “And I only just found out the other day. She was going home to tell you that day, but I’m pretty sure when she got home … Amelia was sick.” She swallows, shrugging.

“I understand you’re mad, but, my God, Logan. Put yourself in her shoes for one second, would you? The girl was driving along with her father on herbirthday, and suddenly, someone ran a red light, crashing into her and killing her dad. Oh, and ended up dead themself. And Maci saw all of this.” Her eyes tear up. “Foryears, she has barely been surviving the aftereffects of that day. She’s carried it around like a fucking anchor attached to her ankle, trying to pull her down.”

She wipes away a few tears. “Your child might have lost her mother, and that is so, so incredibly heartbreaking. But Maci? She didn’t just lose a parent. She lost herself.”

She walks to me, putting her hands on my shoulders and looking up. “And she finally began to find herself again beforeshe found out who Amelia was.” She releases her hand on my left shoulder and waves it at me. “And whoyouare.”

When she steps back, I pinch the bridge of my nose, looking down. “Fuck!” I kick the empty garbage can next to the garage, sending it rolling. “How thefuckam I supposed to explain this to Amy one day, Poppy?”

When I finally settle down, she moves before me again. “You’ll figure it out when you get there,” she says, tilting her head to the side. “The kid lost her mother before she even got a chance to know who she was. Don’t make her lose the next closest thing she could ever have to that too.” Poppy wraps her arms around me. “It’s a fucked-up situation, Logan. I know that. But the universe brought you and Maci together despite the past. I think you should take that as a sign right there.”

She gives me a squeeze before slowly releasing me and stepping back.

“We’re here if you need anything, okay?” she whispers before taking Walker’s hand. “Let’s get going, okay?”

He nods, giving her a tiny smile before looking at me. “If you need anything, Sterns, you know where to find me.”

I don’t speak, just give him a slight bob of my head. As they get in his truck and leave, Maci’s face in that stairwell flashes through my brain. She was so fucking hurt, and I had done that to her. I never wanted to ever cause that woman more pain than she’d already had to endure. And yet I did.

Grabbing the bag from the steps, I jump back in my truck and throw it in reverse. Because I fucked up. And I need to make it right.

By the time I get three pages intoGoodnight, Goodnight Construction Site, Amelia’s eyes are closed, and she’s snoring through her teensy, stuffed-up nose. I could get up. After all, she’s sound asleep. But I find myself closing the book and studying her face. I wish I could memorize everything about her before I lose her for good.

I never really believed we, as humans, could love a person like they are our own child if they genetically weren’t. I’ve been proven wrong because my heart beats for this little girl.

She has this book, as well as two other similar ones at home. But it’s her very favorite, so when I walked by the gift shop and saw it, I knew I had to get it for her so she had it before bed tonight.

Logan left nearly an hour ago, and I’m really hoping he’ll stay home and rest tonight. I know he’s exhausted; he needs some sleep.

“You look so beautiful when you read to her.”

Logan’s voice startles me, as I didn’t expect him to be back so soon. And I take in the sight of him in the doorway, holding two bouquets of flowers in his arm.

“I could watch the two of you for hours, Boston. I’d never get tired of it either.”

I wonder if I’m dreaming because when he left, he made it pretty clear everything between us was over. My delusional brain might be just desperate enough to play this trick on me, giving me a little tease, only to wake me up and rip it away.

As he walks into the room, one of the nurses comes to check on Amelia’s IV.

“Can you come into the hallway with me?” he says, setting the flowers down on the windowsill and holding his hand out.

“Just so you know, I’ll be in here for at least twenty minutes,” the nurse says, giving us a smile. “Go. Take your time. I’ll wait until you get back.”

Staring at his hand, I’m still wondering if this is a dream or if he’s really here. But still, I take it, scooching off the bed and letting him lead me into the hallway.

There is a door with a sign that the waiting room is closed, but he pushes it open and walks in. I follow close behind, finding it empty.

Once it closes behind us, he stands in front of me, cupping my cheeks. “Maci, I am so fucking sorry for the way I treated you earlier.” His deep voice flows through the empty room.

I hang on to his words like they are a lifeline. They are filled with emotion and humility.

“I was angry and maybe a little afraid, and I acted like a complete coward.” He brings his face closer to mine. “What I should have done was tell you it’s okay and that it wasn’t your fault.” He pauses, his eyes growing misty. “Because it wasn’t. Cassandra was the one on her phone. She ran into you—”

“I know that,” I whimper, my lips quivering. “But on the day your daughter lost the chance to ever know her birth mother … I was there.” I break eye contact, trying to look down. “If I hadn’t made that turn … Amelia would have a mother right now.” A painful sob rips through my chest. “I’d give anything to take that day back for her, Logan.” I suck in a breath, trying to calm myself down. “And one day, she’ll know the truth.”

He forces my head up higher, leaving me with nowhere to look but into his eyes.

“And when she does, she’s going to look at me …” I stop, shaking harder. “Just like the way you looked at me in that stairwell. Like I’m a … monster.”

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