Page 45 of The Dirty Saint

I think of Noah and how hard this must be for him, not knowing where I am—not knowing if I’ll ever come back. Honestly, he’s six years old, so he probably has no idea what’s going on, and somehow, that makes me feel worse, not better.

“Touch yourself, Ezra.”

And there’s the end of my break.

“Tono, don’t you have something better to do? Don’t you have—like—hobbies, maybe?”

No answer.

As he comes closer to me, a feeling of eeriness stings my skin.

“Back away,” I demand. “Don’t you fucking come near me.”

Chills run up and down my arms as Tono pulls down his boxers, his cock on full display. I watch him fumble with his erection.

I bite down on a scream when his fingers brush my opening, knowing that I shouldn’t let my enemy see my fear.

“You don’t have to do this. I won’t tell anyone. I promise.”

“Please, Tono,” I say frantically. “Do you have a family? Children? Tono, do not do this. I am someone’s daughter. Tono!” I pull on my shackles, letting them dig even further into my skin. When he spreads my legs wide open, it takeseverything out of me not to explode. “Look at me,” I beg. “Tono, look at me. Don’t do this. Please.”

I feel like I’m seventeen again, losing any and all control.

I need to take some power back.

“I’ll, I’ll do it,” I say softly.

Tono looks at me, confused.

“I will touch myself and will even let you watch. As proof. But only if you promise not to come anywhere near me. Do we have a deal?”

Silence fills the air.

For a moment, I think Tono is going to spit in my face and then laugh at me, but he does neither of those things. He simply nods.

I breathe a heavy sigh of relief.

Shaking, I unbutton my pants, sliding them down to the floor. Then, I hook my fingers inside my underwear and pull them to my knees. The whole time, I can feel his eyes on me.

“You ready?”

I close my eyes, inhale deeply, and then stick two fingers inside my vagina. It burns; I haven’t fingered myself or been fingered in a long time. But slowly, I weave them in and out. Tono smiles.

He’s the only one.

11

Chapter Eleven

After

EZRA

Max Porter is staring at my tits.

Nasty prick.

He should feel lucky that the bell hasn’t rung yet. Because, in about two seconds, his blood is going to be all over my knuckles and I’m gonna kick his dick in.