Page 59 of Loving Jamie

Jamie sits in the centre of the bed, the blankets wrapped around his waist as he stretches his arms above his head. His dark hair is a fluffy mess on top of his head.

I quickly strip my clothes off before I climb back into bed. I start unpacking the bags as I say, “Sorry baby, I went out to grab breakfast. William has the coffee.”

William places the cups on the bedside table before he also climbs into bed with us. He passes one cup over to Jamie.

Jamie looks at the coffee with his eyes squinted. “Latte? With two pumps of vanilla?” He asks.

I nod my head, “Yep. I remembered how sweet you drink your coffee.”

I open the bags and share out the selections of bacon, sausage and egg butties with red sauce, as well as a couple of hash browns. William passes me one of our cups containing regular white coffees and the room is quiet except from the chewing and slurping of drinks.

When I’ve finished my food I ask, “How are you feeling now that you’ve had some more sleep?”

Jamie chugs the rest of his drink and places it on the night table before he says, “I’m ok, I think. I know that there’s nothing I can do about it. He’s going to be walking the same streets as me and unless I leave the area, we will probably exchange paths.” He gets settled under the blankets, leaving his face barely exposed. “I look different to what I did a few years ago. I have all these tattoos and my hair is cut differently, but my face is still the same. My eyes are the same. He will know it's me.”

I hate that I can't make this better for him. I would do anything to take this pain and fear away from him. I lean over to press a kiss to his blanket covered head, “I love you. I’m so sorry that this is happening. But you aren’t alone in this, and for the next couple of days William and I aren’t leaving you out of our sight.”

William snorts. “Well unless you tell us to. But Justin’s right, you aren’t alone in this. We’ll be with you every step of the way.”

“Ok I trust you guys. I don’t want to be away from you and I don’t want to be alone.” Jamie says.

Chapter 34 –

Jamie

I take it back. I want to be alone, even just for a few minutes because fuck me. I can't even be in the bathroom longer than five minutes before one of my Daddies bangs on the door asking if I’m ok.

I appreciate them being here for me. I really do. But I wanna be able to use the toilet without worrying that one of them is going to barge in and see things that Ireallydo not want them to see.

It's been like this for days and while I love them, I need some space before I explode.

I finish washing my hands and pull the door open. The both of them stand there like little worried mother hens. I take a few deep breaths and say, “I’m going to phone Jude and invite him over. So, you guys are free for the next few hours.”

“Really? It’s ok, we don’t mind staying here. We can all do something, maybe watch a film and…”

I hold my hands in front of me and shake my head. Not even letting Justin finish his words. “Nope. I’m fine. I want to spend some time with Jude.”

Justin opens his mouth again but I cut him off, “Alone. We won't go anywhere so you know that I’m safe.”

Justin deflates like a sad puppy.

I look over to William and see his lips tucked into his mouth. I know he’s worried too but he’s not as overwhelming as Justin. And I can't fault him for it, I know he’s anxious.

I wrap an arm around them both and tug them both towards me. I squeeze them and breathe them in. Their masculine spicy scents now smell like home, like safety.

“Are we smothering you?” William asks when I pull back from the hug.

I look at them both and slowly nod my head, pinching my thumb and pointer finger together. “Just a tiny bit. I love you both. but we’ve all been stuck in this apartment for days and I’m feeling stir-crazy. I’m not kicking you out, I just want to spend some time with Jude and then when you guys come back tonight, we can relax and watch a film or something.”

Justin still looks disheartened but he begins to nod his head, “Ok that’s fair enough. We’ll leave and then come back later on.”

William adds on, “Come on, Jamie will be fine for a few hours, how about we go do something fun?”

Justin squints like he couldn’t possibly imagine having fun at a time like this. “Oh yeah? And what do you think would be fun?”

William rolls his eyes, “Well how about we go and do some shopping? If I remember correctly a couple of days ago, we promised to buy Jamie that skirt in every colour.”

“And matching fishnets.” Justin mumbles with a dreamy look on his face.

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