Page 185 of The Broken Aztec Princesses

I knew it from the moment the accusation left my lips. I knew it every day from the moment I woke up. I knew it when I listened to the words he said before he left.

Not all words can be taken back. I saw the evidence of that on his face before he left my bedroom that night. I had done irreparable damage, and I was willing to live with the consequences of my own actions.

But, it wasn’t until I was holding onto my child to stop him from running after Cade, that I realized just how big a fuck up I really made. I wasn’t the only one who loved Cade and wanted him in my life. Adam did as well, and as I tried to explain to himabout Cade’s role and responsibilities, I could barely keep my own tears at bay.

Adam was usually so easy to sway and cheer up, and now I couldn’t pull a smile from his face. I felt like I’d taken yet another parent from him. We’d been at the zoo for a few hours, and I was giving up. Whatever happiness he would feel, we wouldn’t find it here today.

“Hey, monkey. Do you want to go to the mall, grab something to eat and then go home to watch some movies with Auntie Violet and Uncle Chris?”

“Okay.” He nodded somberly, taking my hand and walking away from the gorilla enclosure without even looking back.

By the time we got to the mall, Adam didn’t want to eat there. He wanted to go home and eat with Chris and Violet, so we picked up Chinese and were heading out, when I stopped in front of a kiosk, pulling him out of the pedestrian traffic.

“How about we get one of these?” I pointed to the dog tags with pictures engraved. “One of you and me?”

“Can we get one of Cade, too, and Chris and Violet?” Adam’s big hopeful eyes made my heart hurt.

“We don—Wait, actually.” I pulled out my phone and looked through the pictures. “I have one of you and Cade together. This one?”

I showed Adam the picture I’d snuck of the two of them laughing during a tickle fight. Adam nodded at me, the first smile of the day appearing on his face. I picked another one of us together and placed the order. While we waited, I sent a text to Violet asking for a picture of her and Chris. She sent it first, then asked what it was for, so I sent her a picture of the infographic and told her Adam wanted one. She responded back with a thumbs up and asked me to get one of Adam and me for her.

I ended up getting three of each of the three pictures. I told myself the ones of Adam and Cade were so I could keep extrasfor him in case he lost one, but I couldn’t even convince myself that was the real reason. I didn’t take many pictures of Cade while he was here, and I had none of us to remember our time together, so this was the only reminder of what we had.

What I destroyed.

I put the dog tags on a necklace for Adam and on keychains for Vi and me. We arrived back home an hour later, and I was thankful not to see Martha around.

We set up in the common room, spreading blankets and pillows to make it as fun for Adam as possible. It helped a little, but I could still see my little boy sad when I put him to bed. He wouldn’t even let me take the hat Cade gave him, so I hung it on the headboard, telling him he’d crush it in his sleep otherwise.

I walked back downstairs to find Violet and Chris cleaning up all the blankets and snacks. Disappointment shot through my body before I could cover it.

“You guys are going to bed?” I asked.

“No. I thought we’d just clean up most of it, while you put Adam to bed,” Violet responded.

“Oh,” I sighed with relief. I didn’t want to be alone tonight.

I helped finish cleaning up and we sat back down on the couches. It was nice to be out here, knowing someone wouldn’t come by with a look or request. Violet put another movie on, and I watched with a little wistfully as Chris reclined his seat and pulled Violet to cuddle with him.

I could have had that, and I threw it away because of my damn pride and fears. I settled in to watch the movie, and we were halfway through it, when I felt Cory pull at the mind-link.

‘Hey,’I answered.

‘You knew about Chris and Violet this whole time and never told me?’Cory went straight into it.

Shit.

Violet texted me she told Cory and our parents about their relationship, but I didn’t think Cory would be this angry about it.

‘I did. It wasn’t my news to share.’

‘I thought we weren’t going to be keeping secrets from each other anymore?’Cory accused, and I felt a bit of guilt knowing I’d kept Cade from him, too.

‘Not my secret, Cory. I’m not betraying Violet’s confidence. If she can’t trust either of us, then we can’t keep her safe, can we?’

‘I know. It’s just...’

‘What’s really going on?’I asked.

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