Page 29 of Babies at Coconuts

“Ma, stop it. I’ve got a headache now.”

Suzy ran toward the table. “Oh, my God. There’s red sauce everywhere.” She picked up several sticky, dripping Hibiscus flowers and leis splattered with marinara sauce. Her shoulders drooped. “The leis are for the guests. They’re supposed to be at the guestbook.”

Her voice rose to a fever pitch. “You’ve ruined the table. You’ve ruined the menu. You’re ruining everything. Who do you think you—”

Mama Gia crossed her arms. “I’m the groom’s mother.”

“So am I. Plus, I’m the wedding planner. That means I plan weddings—by myself. I’ve done this for years.”

Mama Gia glared at her. “Wedding guests need food. Lots of food.” She gestured wildly with her hands. “I don’t see any food here except mine. It’s a good thing we stayed up half the night cooking.”

Suzy’s eyebrows shot up. “How did you manage—”

Mama Gia spewed several Italian phrases, Izzy reached for her phone, and Ken and the boys stood stock still.

In an attempt to calm the situation before Jon and Fernando arrived, Suzy asked again, more calmly. “Please tell me—in English—how you managed to cook this food since we were all at the rehearsal dinner last night.”

“Simple. We cooked in our room. We have a suite. Plenty of room. All I needed was a sink and a microwave. I talked the breakfast manager into letting me use their oven. Vinny and Frankie made two runs to the supermarket while Luigi and I cooked non-stop for three hours.” Pleased with her cooking prowess, she dusted her hands. “Finito. Done.”

Suzy’s mouth flew open. “You cooked all of this in your hotel room?”

Mama Gia threw her hands in the air. “Of course. What’s so difficult about that?” Her eyes challenged Suzy’s.

Incredulous, Suzy suddenly felt like laughing. “Nothing, I suppose. Nothing at all.” Part of her wanted to be angry but now the entire episode made her giggle. She felt like she was in a sitcom. “Our wedding guests certainly won’t go hungry.”

“I wanted to contribute. Fernando’s my son, you know.”

Suzy’s tone softened. “You’re right. Thank you. I guess we should have worked this out beforehand, but it’s done. Finito, as you said.” She grinned. “Very impressively, I might add.” Weighing her options, Suzy knew battling Jon’s future mother-in-law would not be in his best interests. Turning toward the men, she said, “Will you bring another table out and see if Gus has a fresh tablecloth we can use. If it’s a different color, we’ll use it for the gift table.” Winking, she added, “I’m learning to be flexible.”

---