Page 124 of Babies at Coconuts

Chapter 87

Still slightly woozy, which could no longer be attributed to food poisoning, nor the flu, Alex’s recent pregnancy comment gnawed on Suzy like a toothache. Chewing on her lip, she turned into her driveway, but instead of parking in the garage, did a U-turn and drove in the opposite direction. It’s not possible. Ken and I rarely have sex these days. We’re either too busy or too tired. But I’ve got to know.

Suzy drove through every yellow light and pulled into the nearest Walgreens. Feeling conspicuous, she strolled the makeup aisle, examined twenty tubes of nail polish, bought two greeting cards, a bag of Hershey’s chocolates, and eventually worked up the nerve to purchase a pregnancy test. Fumbling with the items in her cart, she muttered to the bored cashier that the kit was for her daughter.

Once she arrived home with the scary Walgreens bag, Suzy thanked the empty house that no one was there. She plunked her makeup and other items on the kitchen counter and opened the bag of chocolates. Her plan on the drive home was to take the test immediately. Instead, after eating five chocolates, she threw in a load of whites. Cursing herself, she unloaded the dishwasher. Why am I stalling? Eventually she reached for the pregnancy kit, got a glass of water, and worked up the nerve to enter the bathroom.

Once she got up her courage, she locked the door. Her heart hammered as she peed on the stick. Seconds seemed like hours. Suzy set the stick on the vanity and washed her hands but couldn’t bear to view the results. She combed her hair, decided to cross the hall toward the kitchen, but turned on her heel, and returned to the bathroom.

In a cold sweat, she focused on the applicator that indicated a big, bold + sign.

Oh. My. God. She wrapped the telltale device in toilet paper not once but three times before placing it in the trash. This isn’t possible.Well, it’s possible but no. Hell no.

Suzy glanced at the clock, grabbed her purse, and drove to the nearest CVS, determined to try a different brand. A better brand. A more accurate brand. She bought three more pregnancy tests—all different varieties, some generic and some name brand, to be sure of an accurate reading.

Racing home while she still had the house to herself, she locked the bathroom door again. Tearing open all three boxes at warp speed, she lined them up on the bathroom counter like marching band members, two inches apart. Acting as though she were a research scientist who didn’t want to risk tainting the test results, Suzy downed a big bottle of Smart water for good measure and to ensure she’d have plenty of urine and get some added electrolytes in the process.

Peeing on three tests, one by one, Suzy bit her lip and waited—in the bathroom. She paced in the small room, reapplied pink lipstick for no good reason, redid her ponytail, and stared in the mirror. You can’t be pregnant.

Her stomach did flip-flops. I’m nearly 40, have a grown son, a feisty teen stepdaughter, and now a granddaughter. I don’t want to start over with a second family. Her heart thrashed. What will Ken say? What will Jon think? Izzy will assume I’m nuts, and Alex and Hope will be in utter shock.

Suzy snorted at the thought of Alex’s reaction. She knew she would tease her mercilessly. Hope might think it was cool—or not. It didn’t matter since, one by one, every single test came back positive. Her mouth went dry as she wondered whether to laugh or cry. She loved children but thought she was finished raising them.

Oh, my God. I’m pregnant.

Once again destroying the evidence with wads of tissue paper, Suzy dumped the used wands into the kitchen trash bag, buried the boxes of kits, and topped the trash with overly ripe tomatoes and moldy strawberries. Then she took the bag outside.

As a dog barked in the distance, Suzy stared ahead in a daze. I can’t wrap my head around this. I guess I should call my gynecologist but I’m not anywhere near ready for that discussion.

After securing the lid on the trash, she strode back inside and busied herself by placing a roast and carrots in the crock pot. It was Ken’s favorite meal. Maybe a nice dinner before the disconcerting discussion would help.

Choosing soothing, ambient music to calm herself, Suzy tried to relax, but the spa-like, swooshing water sounds had an adverse effect. It reminded her of a baby in the womb. She shut the music off and turned on the television. A medical talk show featured an infertility doctor as a guest. Suzy had always felt sorry for women who were unable to conceive. I can’t get away from this.

Pouring herself a cup of coffee, she added more water to the roast and the remaining coffee on top. That had been her former mother-in-law’s secret to browning and tenderizing the meat. Sprinkling salt and pepper on top, she added cream of mushroom soup and dry onion soup, then set the crock pot to low.

Staring out the kitchen window at nothing, her pulse raced. She placed two fingers on her wrists, taking deep breaths. I should remain calm for the baby. Suzy rubbed her arms. A baby. The mere shock of the news gave her a chill. I’ve got to tell someone. I owe it to Ken to tell him first but maybe the conversation will go over better if I bounce this off my girlfriends first.

Before she could overthink it, she texted Alex, Hope, and Cheri. Can you meet me at Coconuts in an hour? It’s urgent.

The minute she sent the text, guilt overcame her. Feeling as if she were betraying Ken by not telling him initially, she tried to assuage herself that her girlfriends had been in her life longer. After all, she and Ken had led separate lives with other spouses for nearly twenty years. She wondered how excited her high school sweetheart would be about a new, second child at their age. They had never discussed having children together since they each had one of their own.

A new thought made Suzy’s mouth go dry. What if Ken is miserable about the news and leaves me? I can’t handle being a single mom again. Grabbing her car keys, she headed to Coconuts.

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