Page 29 of Kiss From A Rose

Nine of the twelve available rooms were filled this weekend, and I'd been busy. It felt good to be appreciated and wanted, evenneeded. Christmas was almost here, and I missed my family. I knew Gray had my phone number now, but he hadn't called. He hadn't even replied to my message.

Leah told me she went to see him, and that he was still processing the fact that I left. She did say that he kept telling her he loved me and wanted me back, but then I knew he would. That would be his knee-jerk reaction. Now, I'd been gone over three weeks, and I had a feeling in a few more days, he'd realize that he was happy without me. That hurt, but I knew that washow his feelings would evolve. It wasn't like he had made his disinterest in our marriage and me a secret.

Willow had finally called. One of my children was reaching out, and I was grateful. I just hoped that this conversation would not go like the one with Jude. I was still raw and wounded from that interaction.

"Mama, I'm so sorry," she said, and I could hear she was crying.

"Oh, no, baby girl, this is all my fault. You didn't do anything. You know, sometimes couples move apart, that's all. Your father still loves you and Jude, as do I."

"That's not what I'm sorry about. Well, I am, but I'm mostly sorry for how I've been ignoring you. I'm so sorry for the way Jude and I have been talking to you these past years. I don't know when we became such terrible children."

"You're not terrible children," I protested. "You're the best kids any mother could have, and I'm lucky and grateful to have you in my life. Now, tell me how are things at school? When I told Malou's doctor that my daughter was in pre-med in NYU, he was so impressed."

I thought that would help divert her attention, but she cried some more.

"Oh, Willow. No, my baby, don't cry. It's all fine and—"

Her boyfriend Mike came on the line then. "Hi, Mrs. Rutherford; how are you?"

"I told you to call me Rose, Mike. Is Willow okay? God, did I say something to hurt her feelings? You'll tell her I'm so sorry, won't you? I never—"

"Rose, you didn't say anything wrong. Willow is sad because…well, because she's been a bit of a bitch to you."

"Don't you dare call my daughter a bitch," I cried out.

He laughed. "I wish you were my mother, Rose. But the truth is that Willow has been a bitch. And Jude's been an asshole toyou. Willow gets it now, and she's horrified with herself, as she should be."

"My kids are not like that, Mike—"

"Yes, they are. That's why you left. I saw with my own eyes,andI wasn't surprised when you walked away, but your kids and husband were."

Since I didn't have anything to say to that, I remained silent. Maybe they weren't surprised, but I doubted they weremissingme. Jude never had, and Gray didn't even notice I existed, so why would he start feeling my absence now?

"Rose," Mike said.

"Yes, I'm here."

"I wanted to ask if we could come see you for Christmas."

I was shocked when he said that. "But I thought y'all would go to Atlanta to be with Gray."

"Yeah, so I'm not a big fan of your husband or Jude right now, Rose, no offense. But if you would be open to it, Willow and I would love to spend the holidays with you."

I swallowed. "Mike, Gray will—"

"It's either that, or we stay in New York."

Mike didn't have family and that would mean they'd be alone. I couldn't have that. "No, no. You should come here. You can stay at my friend's B&B. It's so beautiful, even in the winter. We don't have many people the week of Christmas, just two couples. We'll have a lovely holiday. I'll text you all the details, and you let me know when y'all will be here."

"Thanks, Rose. I appreciate it. Willow is still upset, but I promise she'll call back."

Once my call with Mike ended, I felt sadness envelop me. Gray was going to be heartbroken that his baby girl didn't want to spend Christmas with him. God! I wish I could talk to him, but I knew what would happen if I called—I'd have to speak with Aimee and….

This was what divorce meant—I told myself sternly as I pulled up Gray's contact information—that we would have to talk to one another about our children if nothing else.

I heard Malou coughing and went to check on her.

I sat down on the bed by her.

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