Page 25 of Kiss From A Rose

"Yeah?"

"I think so. A friend of mine went through something, and she went to a therapist. She said it helped. Dad, Mama wasn't angry when I talked to her. She was just resigned, you know? She said she loves me but won't tolerate my disrespect. I feel so ashamed."

I heard the tears in his voice. My son had emulated me. This was onme.

"Jude, this started with me. I ignored your mother and taught you to do that. It's my fault. You talk to someone, and I…I'll talk to your mother. I'm going to fix this." I had no clue how to do that, but I was the Dad, yeah? It was my job tofixthings no matter how screwy they got.

"You are?"

"I have no choice, son. I can't live without your mama. The past two weeks have been hell. I can't breathe without my Rose." This was the bald truth. I'd die without her.

After I finished talking to Jude, I went up to the window of my office and looked out at downtown Atlanta, my stomach feeling hollow. What the fuck kind of man was I?

"You're the best man I know, my darling Gray."

"Why do you always call me that? My darling Gray?" I suckled her nipple because it was close to my mouth.

It was a couple of years ago, and we'd just had sex. She was still wet and messy with my cum between her thighs. Sincethe kids had left home, our sex life had changed. We had sex wherever we wanted. This time, we were on the leather couch in the living room.

She was sitting up, and I was snuggled into her.

"Because you are,my darling. I…you don't like it?"

"It's not that. It's just…you’ve been calling me that for years."

"Since the beginning."

I stroked her other breast and squeezed the nipple. I was still as fascinated with Rose's body and her as I'd been when I took her virginity. Rose was the sexiest woman I'd ever known—but it was more than her beauty and her body; it was her warmth. When she was with me, I was in a safe cocoon, and all my worries were far, far away.

"Say you love me?" I demanded, moving her so she covered me.

She kissed my mouth and smiled.

"I love you, my darling Gray."

My heart felt so full I thought it would burst with love for her.

I positioned her to straddle me so I could slide inside her again, stay inside her; it was my favorite place in the world.

"Good girl. Now, ride me because I'm hard again."

I realized that I didn't say it back. I didn't tell her I loved her too.

When was the last time I told her I loved her? I couldn't recall.

Did I stop saying it? Iusedto say it. I always told our kids, but I don't think I said it to Rose.

Why had I stopped? I still loved her. The fact that I could barely function right now made that evident.

I needed her. I knew that. I asked her, commanded her to say she loved me and didn't give her the words back. I didn't give her the actions either. What the hell else was she supposed to do but think that I didn't want her?

Anger surged through me. I rammed my fist through the wall, leaving a shallow divot that bruised my knuckles.

Aimee knocked on my door and opened it without waiting for my answer. I turned to look at her and saw her eyes went straight to the crack in the wall.

"Yes?"

I really didn't have time for her today. Or the patience. The fact that she thought I was interested in her made me angry as a bull with a red cape in his face. I thought of her as almost a kid. I was her mentor. She was my right hand. A close colleague. I was going to hire only male EAs from now on so that people would shut the fuck up. Or maybe the next rumor would be that I'm gay!

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