Page 24 of Grave Peril

But on top of all that, she was drop-dead gorgeous. Rip had thought so before he’d had any alcohol. She had a timeless beauty, with her thick, wavy hair and huge brown eyes. And she wasn’t a stick figure. She had curves, making Rip wish he could run his hands over them.

“Are you thinking about something?” Lela had her jacket off and her feet up on the chair. She hugged her knees, waiting for his reply.

“Just about you.” That didn’t sound right. “I mean, you’re an impressive woman.” Rip was digging himself a hole.

Lela took a sip of beer, and Rip watched as her lips wrapped around the bottle opening. How he wished he could feel her full, sensual lips against his. He needed to get a grip.

“I don’t see a ring on your finger,” Lela said, glancing at his left hand. “A hunky guy like you—I’m guessing early forties—without a woman?”

Rip froze.

Lela looked up at him through her dark eyelashes. “Why is that?” When he didn’t answer, her voice got softer. “Did she leave you?”

Rip downed the last of his beer. Then he looked into her eyes, agonizing over the answer to that question—even after all this time. “She died.”

Silence stretched between them.

Lela put her hand on his arm. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.”

“It’s okay,” Rip said. “It’s a fair question.”

“What was her name…if you don’t mind my asking?”

“Isabel Fierro; she was my fiancée. She was only twenty-six when she died.”

“You were in the Navy?”

“Yes, I joined right out of high school. I was sweet on Isabel even then. But when I went off to the service, she was only sixteen.” Rip stared out at the water, not really seeing it. “But I came home for visits, and…we fell in love.”

“But you didn’t get married?”

“No, I didn’t get the chance to marry her. I was committed to my career and planned to stay in for ten years. The wedding date was set for when I got out.” Rip looked back at Lela. “It’s not a story I share often.”

Lela didn’t say a word.

“She’d wanted to get married sooner, but I wouldn’t agree. Until I was home for good, it wouldn’t have been fair to her.” Rip ran his hand through his hair. “I’d seen too many guys try to sustain relationships while on deployments. It didn’t work. It’s just too hard on the woman.”

Rip rubbed his eyelids with his thumb and forefinger. “I was just about to retire from the Navy…but it was too late.”

“You haven’t gotten over her, have you?”

“I loved her.” Rip wasn’t in the habit of revealing such an intimate feeling. He stood up and paced the deck. Then he looked at Lela. She watched him, but didn’t comment. “I apologize for talking about it with you. It’s not your issue. You have enough to worry about.”

Lela stood and took his hand. “I asked…I want to know.”

Since when had Rip opened his heart to a woman? He was on thin ice, and needed to rein in his feelings before things got out of hand.

“If you’re done with that beer, how about we find some dinner? Nic said there’s stuff in the freezer.” Rip took her inside and they rummaged for food.

For the rest of the evening, Lela was fairly quiet, which was just as well. Rip didn’t want to talk about it anymore.

After they cleaned up, Lela went to her room and shut the door. Rip stretched out on his bed and crossed his feet at the ankles. He stared up at the ceiling.

How had things veered off the path so badly? Rip was there to ensure Lela’s safety, and for no other reason. But he’d shared a story that was so personal he rarely talked about it.

Lela had brought it up. She seemed interested in him, and wanted to get to know him. But that wouldn’t be good. He had to stay professional. Her life was at risk.

This wasn’t a time for romantic interludes, or for him to indulge his sexual urges toward Lela. But he did want her. He’d be a fool not to. She was all he wanted in a woman, and more.

But it didn’t matter. His heart wasn’t available. Isabel had been his first love. And he hadn’t been able to forgive himself for what had happened to her. He hadn’t even given her the wedding she’d dreamed of, because of his unchangeable plans.

And now it was too late. Rip couldn’t change the past. There was no redemption. He’d failed her.

Lela deserved better than he had to offer. She wasn’t a woman to fall in bed with purely for pleasure. But his heart had been taken long ago. He didn’t have love to give to Lela. So it wasn’t going to happen…no matter how much he desired her.

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