Page 2 of For Eva

Miles cocked his head and stared out the window. “No. I wanna be a lawyer. Like Dad.”

A thousand knives stabbed my heart, and I gripped the steering wheel so tight I thought it would break. I was thankful for the red light ahead and used the time to quickly swipe my fingers under my sunglasses before Miles saw my tears.

I smiled at him in the rearview mirror. My precious boy who looked so much like his father that it was almost too painful a reminder of the life we’d had—or the life I’d hoped we’d have. “Well, I think you should do whatever makes you happy.”

He shifted his gaze from the window to look at me with his blue-gray eyes—Aaron’s eyes—and nodded. “Yeah. And if I get bored with that, I’ll go pitch for the Braves. Atlanta isn’t that far, right?”

“Four hours. Just don’t make me drive down there during rush hour to watch you play.”

“I’m gonna fly you in my private jet,” Miles said.

I smacked my hand against my forehead. “Right. Because whywouldn’tyou have a private jet? You’ll be a famous millionaire major league pitcher.”

We both giggled as the light changed to green, and I turned onto the side street that connected to our cul-de-sac. I was able to laugh away the tears by the time I pulled into our driveway and saw Drew laid out on top of the front stoop.

What the hell?

“I’m going to Max’s,” Miles announced before ejecting himself from the car and running into our neighbor’s yard.

I blew out a steady breath before grabbing Miles’s backpack and heading for the door. I stood on the step directly below Drew and removed my sunglasses, squinting so I could zero in on his coffee-colored eyes—my eyes—which glistened in the sun.

He grinned at me. “What’s up?”

I sighed. “What’s up withme? What’s up withyou? I thought you had football practice after school.”

Drew pushed himself up against the black iron railing that climbed the stairs to the house and swept his blond bangs out of his face. “It got canceled. Coach said it was too hot. Which it is because I’ve been out here for an hour waiting for you to get home, and I’m sweating to death.”

I rolled my eyes and shoved the key into the lock on the front door, dropping my purse on the console in the foyer.

“What happened to your key?” I asked, kicking off my sandals and heading into the kitchen.

He followed behind me and pulled a Gatorade out of the fridge. “I dunno.”

“What do you mean ‘you dunno’? You can’t go around losing house keys, Drew.”

He shrugged. “I mean, it’s here somewhere, I just have to find it.”

“How’d you even get home?”

“This guy Jackson.”

Fucking high school.

I pressed my hands into the cool granite countertop. “What? Who’s Jackson? We’ve had this discussion multiple times. I don’t want you getting into cars with people I don’t know.”

“Oh my God, Mom, chill out. He’s a junior on the varsity team. He asked if I needed a ride when all the practices were canceled. What was I supposed to say? My mom doesn’t let me get in cars with strangers?”

I ran my hands through my hair. “Look, I know that’s embarrassing, but you’re not even fifteen yet. I just need some time to adjust to this whole high school thing. So, for now, if this happens again, go to the office and call me.”

“Might help if you’d get me a freaking cell phone since every other person I know has one.”

“I’ve told you we’ll figure that out. Just bear with me for a bit, okay?”

Drew expelled an obnoxiously loud sigh and mumbled “whatever” before retreating into the living room.

“Don’t ‘whatever’ me, Drew!”

I pulled in another deep breath and exhaled slowly, releasing my clenched fists and jaw. I couldn’t count how many consciousbreaths I’d taken since Aaron left. All I knew was I wanted just one day of breathingunconsciously. And the frustration and anger and sadness I felt not knowing if that day would ever come was almost too much to bear sometimes.

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