Page 62 of Blood and War
“Does it make you angry? Seeing her with him?” Will added, his smile wicked through the flames. Kellan had to avert his gaze before he did something stupid.
“Jace is the only man she’s ever let in.” Sam taunted.
“In more ways than one.” Their laughter erupted again.
He needed to get out. So close. He was so close to stepping over that edge. One more comment and he’d?—
“She doesn’t want you. She chose him.” Will motioned toward the two sleeping figures in their tangled embrace.
Kellan was on his feet, exiting the cave before he’d make any rash decisions. If he’d waited one more minute. One more second, the brothers wouldn’t be breathing, and the cavern would be painted in blood. He could imagine their flesh in his hands, their throats constricting beneath his fingertips as they gasped for air. He wouldn’t lie, it would have brought him immense pleasure to have them die by his bare hands. Strangling them wouldn’t have been his preferred method, but in the moment, it would have sufficed. Anything to silence their mouths.
It shouldn’t have bothered him, seeing them like that. Wrapped around each other as they slept. It shouldn’t have mattered. She’d said they were friends from a young age, and that was all it was.Why did that even matter?Kellan ran a hand down his face as he groaned. Maybe Eire was right. Maybehe was growing soft. Losing touch with himself and the world around him.
Toeing a rock with his boot he kicked it, watching it fly, disappearing into the darkness beyond them. He listened, waiting for it to land as it crashed into the dirt. His senses still felt out of sorts, but beyond the canyon things felt that bit clearer. Like he could finally breathe again. He’d find out what was blocking his abilities later. Before they left in the morning. Kane could have been doing just that, judging by the lack of a lookout.
“I can punch them out if it’d make you feel better?”
Kellan was so lost in his thoughts he startled, turning as he looked down at her. She was standing right outside the entrance, arms crossed over the swell of her chest as she watched him with bright eyes. Something like amusement, maybe even more. She’d left the familiar dark cloak inside, and Kellan let himself take her in. The fitted clothing that seemingly hugged her every curve. He fought against the smile threatening to break at the sight of her as that incessant pull flared to life. He was so fucked. “It’s nothing.”
“Not what it looked like.” She shifted her position, now leaning casually against the stalagmite. Her eyes didn’t leave his. “They’re annoying, I know, but don’t let it get to you. They want to make you angry.”
“I don’t like it.” He grumbled. Dislike would have been a complete underselling of his feelings, but he wouldn’t get into it with her. Not wanting to cause even more of a rift between her and her people.
“Whatever they said, don’t believe it.” He was sure she was fast asleep when he’d practically run outside, and although he hadn’t wanted to believe them, that jealousy reared its ugly head. “They’re nothing but a bunch of assholes.”
“Kind of hard not to when it’s right in front of me, staring me in the face.” Kellan pulled his gaze from her, looking the other way. It took more effort than he cared to admit. He didn’t dare meet her eyes. Hated how vulnerable she’d made him feel. Despised it, yet he couldn’t get her out of his head. Longed to feel the softness of her skin on his. To race his fingers up and down her arms. Kellan shook his head, frustrated all over again.
“Kellan.” She stood in front of him, grabbing his arm. His name like a song on her lips. One he wanted to hear again and again. “Kellan.” She repeated, more stern the second time around. Slowly, he returned his gaze, eyes meeting once more. “Ignore every single word they said.” Kellan managed to hold back the shiver that threatened to course through his body as she ran her hand slowly up his arm and up to his chest where it rested.Barely.
“I don’t know what to think anymore.” Before he could stop himself, Kellan’s palm was resting against the warmth of her cheek, so soft beneath his fingertips. “The way I was. Everything I knew…” He trailed off. Kellan moved to turn away again, but stopped himself. “It’s you. I don’t… I shouldn’t.” Shaking his head, he forced his eyes closed. By the fucking gods, he knew anything between them was out of the question. Anything between him and a human girl was utterly forbidden, but he was losing the battle and couldn’t stop himself.
“Kellan.” Demitria’s voice was no more than a whisper, breath wavering at their closeness. He couldn’t hold back any longer. Kellan’s eyes shot open, lips meeting hers in a fiery kiss. She stumbled back into the rock at its intensity, but didn't make a move to break away. He near collapsed into her, pushing himself closer. He’d lost all control. All ability to think rationally the moment she’d touched him.
In a dizzying haze, Demitria was untying his armor, shoving it to the ground until he’d been stripped down to nothing morethan the pants he wore. Her fingers trailed up his abdomen from the waistline, up toward his chest. Feeling the warmth of his skin beneath her fingertips, and the sheer muscle as she passed over them. To the thin silvery white line of the new scar that graced his chest from the hit he’d taken for her.
Kellan let his own hands explore every inch of her he could. Softly up her sides, slowly working their way underneath the hem of her shirt. The shiver worked its way through her body, eliciting a grin as he nipped at her bottom lip. Couldn’t get enough. He couldn’t get enough of her.
“Whatever they said, it isn’t true.” She whispered, hot against the sun-kissed skin of his chest as ever so slowly, she let her mouth trail down, down, down. Kellan groaned at the sight of her kneeling before him as wicked thoughts filled him to the brim. Imagining what it would feel like to have that mouth wrapped around him. When delicate fingers traced along the waist of his pants, his only thoughts were to throw his head back against the rock behind him. He was fucked. So, so fucked as those green-gold eyes met his. As they stared into hissoul.
Grabbing her wrists in his large hands, Kellan pulled her to her feet before spinning them, pinning her figure to the smooth rock. So small, as he held her arms above her head with just one hand, the other pressed firm beside her head as his hulking figure towered over her. He watched her chest heave, up and down with each breath she took.
Kellan stepped further into her, feeling her up against the planes of his body, and let his free hand roam along every inch of her, relishing in the sound as her breath hitched. Claiming her mouth with his once more, tasting her, he let that hand wander further until a small sound slipped through her lips.
He was so ready to lose himself in her. To toss all caution to the wind, and absolutely devour her. Kellan imagined taking her right then and there on the ground. Imagined running his handsover every speck of skin as he mapped her with his fingers, trailing them along the smooth skin of her stomach, her thighs, before delving them inside until she was writhing beneath him, making that noise that drove him absolutelyferal.
But when he imagined his hands again, they were tainted red. Dripping that scarlet liquid between his fingers as she lay on the ground motionless, blood pouring from the gruesome slash across her throat.
Something snapped in him at the thought, so much like the brutal death his mother had suffered. Like the crack of a whip, pulling him from the frenzy he’d been in, breaking him from the spell of the human girl before him. Not regret. Definitely not that, but something akin to it. Guilty. He’d felt guilty over what had transpired, because it made him no better than his father. For taking a human when it was utterly forbidden. The council hadbeatenit into them so many times that he couldn’t even enjoy what had just transpired. Because fuck, he wanted to. Wanted to explore the sounds that had come out of her mouth as he touched her, igniting some long-smothered fire within him.
Kellan took a step back, pulling away from her touch as he regained some form of restraint within himself.
Demitria was the first to break the silence. “I’m sorry—I shouldn’t have.”
He wasn’t, not even for a moment. Neither one had been willing to break their gaze, but her cheeks blossomed into warm shades of pinks. She reached a tentative hand toward him, but dropped it just as quickly. For a moment, he’d thought she’d felt regret, but it was something similar to what he’d been warring with himself. Everything they’d ever known. Been told?—
“I know.” He replied. It took every fiber in his body to convince himself to take another step back. For his hands to remain at his sides.
Demitria was stronger than he could even fathom. She straightened out her clothing, the breath shuddering through her shoulders as she willed her body to calm before turning away from him on shaky legs. He watched as she evened out her breathing before hesitantly returning to the cave. She stopped short, nearly out of eyesight before turning around to face him once more. Opening her mouth to say something, the heavy sigh left her lips instead, and she disappeared back into the awaiting darkness.
