Page 54 of Cinnamon Roll Set Up

I can only shake my head. Too many emotions are battling it out behind my ribs right now. If I try to explain how I feel about Miles dating someone else to them in actual human words, I’ll wind up crying over my pizza.

“Does he really want you to set him up?” Eliza asks.

“No. I was steamrolling him into it.” Because I’m such a good friend.

I kind of want to strangle that sentence.

“And he doesn’t know how you feel?” Harper asks.

I shake my head again. “I don’t even know how I feel.”

Except, I think I do. It’s like I’d kept all my emotions behind this dirty, smudged glass, and little by little, I’ve been washing the gunk away. Maybe I don’t quite see everything clearly yet, but it’s taking a very particular shape.

“I don’t know how to do relationships. My parents killed theirs so spectacularly, I don’t know how a healthy one even works.”

“You’ve seen us.” Harper’s smile turns just a touch self-conscious.

Yeah, I’ve seen them.

“We can be your good examples.”

I wrinkle my nose. “My brother? Yuck.”

“Your brother is my biggest fan and loudest cheerleader. He looks out for me when I’m too tired or too distracted to do it myself. He takes care of me in big and small ways.” She gets this wistful look on her face I recognize all too well. “He’s my champion. So yes, he can be your good example.”

She’s not wrong. They are stupidly in love. Sometimes it makes my chest ache to see that play out in words and actions. Even in my earliest memories, Mom and Dad were never like that. Sam would walk through fire to get to Harper—and she would do exactly the same for him.

Ugh. Fine. Maybe Sam is a good example after all.

“And look, I was a mess when Dean fell in love with me.” Eliza grins at me, unashamed. “And he still decided to come alongside me and fight for me and encourage me and love the heck out of me. You don’t have to know how to do it to love somebody. You just do.”

I want to tell her that’s terrible advice, but it actually kind of makes me feel better.Just do.

“And let me tell you.” She leans forward like she’s ready to spill all the juicy bits. “Being friends doesn’t mean you can’t get together. It’s basically the number one requirement to becoming anything more.”

My heart squeezes so hard, I can’t tell if I’m comforted or terrified.

Chapter 19

Miles

My brain is trying to kill me. It’s honestly doing a pretty good job. Kudos.

I should have known when I had trouble sleeping last night. Definitely should have suspected when I struggled to keep track of the ingredients when I made pumpkin cinnamon rolls this morning. But I couldn’t avoid it when half my vision turned blurry.

I don’t get migraines often, maybe every other month. More when I’m stressed out over writing deadlines, tax time for the bookshop, or if my mom’s health has hit an especially bad patch. Maybe later I’ll examine my mindset to hunt for a cause for this one, but right now, all I can do is sit here and die slowly.

It’s like my brain is ballooning, pressing against a skull lined with broken glass. The pain makes a detour straight through my right eye socket like I’ve been hit across the face with a two-by-four. My medication kicked in, but now I’ve got the headache, nausea,andcaffeine jitters.

Not a great day.

“Do you mind putting on something else?” I ask Arlo. “I’m struggling with the country today.”

It feels like there’s a steel guitar playing in my brainpan, and I need it to stop.

“Sure thing.” He messes with the old music player, and something classical fills the room. “Better?”

“Yes. Thank you.”

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