Page 31 of My Heart Before You

A loud click from the heater system echoed in the room followed by the reassuring rush of warm air being pumped through the vents.

Her twin exhaled slowly. “They’re good. Liam loves first grade. He’s such a big little man now, it’s funny to watch. Just the other day, he decided that he was going to do all the dishes by himself after dinner. I had Scott supervise, of course.”

“Of course,” she said. “And Penny?”

Analie held her breath for a moment and then let out in a fast exhale, “Honestly, Em, she’s horrible.”

She snorted at her sister’s frankness. Analie had always held back the truth before since Emilie didn’t have her daughter; it seemed heartless to complain about Penny—even when she was being challenging.

“Liam was never like this at three. He was a bit of a handful at two, but I just attributed that to the fact that I was pregnant, and he was adjusting to our family growing. She’s a downright nightmare sometimes. Full tantrums, not only at home, but the store and occasionally at school. She’s taken to dressing herself in the craziest assortment of clothes you can imagine, and we can’t say a single thing or another tantrum will ensue.

“Scott and I stand outside her bedroom in the morning and rock, paper, scissors for who’s going to wake her up that day. She always ends up screaming and crying over something the moment she’s awake. It’s exhausting.”

The idea of two grown adults huddling in fear outside of the bedroom of a tiny three-year-old had her laughing so hard. Her sister raised her eyebrows and patiently waited for her to stop.

“I’m sorry,” she gasped for air. “I’m sorry. Just the idea of the two of you hiding from Penny is funny.”

“Well she’s not the sweet little thing you remember from before you moved over the summer.” Analie crossed her arms.

She wiped the corner of her eye. “Do you think it’s switching her to preschool instead of daycare?”

“No. Mom and the teachers say it’s just her ‘being three.’ I’m holding out hope that things will change with her birthday next month, but apparently according to Mom, I was the same way at that age until I was five.” Her sister let out a defeated breath and tilted her head towards the dark-stained exposed beams of her whitewashed ceiling.

“You’ve always had an opinion.”

It was Analie’s turn to mock gasp. “Who me?”

They giggled easily for a moment before her twin put her empty coffee cup on the table. “If we're being honest, I have to ask. How are you doing? Like really doing.”

“Actually, I’m doing really well. There’s times when I feel like the old me, but at the same time it’s a new me. Does that make sense?”

“Yes.”

Picking up her mug, Emilie drank the dregs from it in one swallow.

“Have you had another panic attack since you were mugged in the park?” Analie pressed.

“Almostmugged.” She pointed with her mug before setting it down. “I pepper sprayed that jerk, remember?”

“And some guy from work if I recall correctly.”

All of a sudden, she was assaulted with thoughts of Colin, but not just thoughts. Textures. The way he leaned past her to grab a stethoscope from behind her computer last shift, and she could smell that comforting pine and sea salt scent of him. Pulling her plush bathrobe tighter around herself, she tried to ignore the prickling sensation running up her arms.

“Em, answer seriously. Are you okay?”

She blinked to focus back on her sister. “Yeah. Some days are harder than others. Work has been a good constant. It’s so gratifying to be able to help others again, to contribute. I thought I’d be lonely on my days off not having someone to live with after living at Mom and Dad’s for so long, but I actually really like having my own space to decompress.”

Her sister nodded. For as much as Analie liked to talk, she was a really good listener.

“I spend my time off trying to make new connections with people here and continuing the healthy habits I built at home. I’ve befriended the most adorable elderly couple, Bo and Mary, they feel like a twenty-year foreshadowing of Mom and Dad. They own the fifties diner I’m always talking about, and I usually have lunch with Mary once a week.”

Mary’s amusing anecdotes about her life allowed her to share a truth or two about her own. The wise woman always listened patiently and had just the balm that she needed.

“I also spend time with Ash, who’s very excited to meet you by the way. She’s actually off today and said she’d be free to meet up whenever. You guys will love each other. I can just tell.”

“I can’t wait to meet her,” her twin said. “Do you want to have lunch with her today? You can show me the diner, and I can meet her at the same time.”

She stifled a snort. Analie was always the queen of multitasking. “Sure.”

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