Page 15 of My Heart Before You

It’s okay. We’re okay. We’re closer than we’ve been in a long time.

When she remained speechless for several breaths, Nia spoke.

“Thank you for sharing that with me,” the older woman paused. “I know that you’ve already done a lot of work processing what happened to you and learning to forgive your sister for not having experienced the same things as you, but I want you to know that every step you take towards your new normal with her is a good step.

“You may never find that the relationship is exactly the same as before and that’s okay. You and Analie are working towards a new relationship, and I am proud of you for allowing her to be part of your life while you build roots here.”

She nodded, too tired to answer with words.

Nia assessed her silence as completion on the subject and shifted gears. “How’s work going?”

Emilie felt like she was being pulled from mud. The sluggishness in her veins slowly dissipated as thoughts of something positive flowed through her brain. “Good. Really good, actually.”

“What about it is good?”

“I feel better having something to do that I know I’m good at. When I’m working, I feel just like I used to before . . . It’s a relief actually. For the longest time, I felt I was capable of nothing. Little things like cooking and cleaning for myself or driving a car were such big accomplishments.

“When I started taking the nurse refresher classes to go back to work, I wasn’t sure how I’d feel in the hospital environment again, but I knew I wanted that part of my life back. Now that I’m up to full speed, it just reminds me how much I love what I do, and it makes me feel so lucky to be able to help people again . . . I’m grateful to have an area in my life that didn’t completely change.”

This time Nia jumped right in. “Many things did change for you, but from what you’ve told me, some things stayed the same. The love of your parents never changed, nor did that of your sister towards you. True, there was a time you weren’t able to accept that love, but their love for you persisted through that time nonetheless.”

A gentle warmth flushed her limbs. Having their unwavering support made it easier for her to try and start her life over here.

“So your relationship with your family is strong . . .” Nia flipped back a page of her legal pad. “. . . and you’re making friends here?”

The contented feeling continued to blush through her body thinking of Ash and their budding friendship. “Yes.”

“Good, and what about dating?”

Emilie waited for the familiar flood of nausea to blow through her, but instead twin emotions warred with each other and for once, she was dumbfounded. Normally, when asked this question, all she felt was a visceral, punch to the stomach “no” that quickly forced out of her mouth. But when Nia asked, her right arm felt that same strange sensation when Dr. Abernan held her hand in his.

She rubbed her arm. “I don't . . .” Her mind saw his blue-grey eyes fixated on their entwined hands. “I . . . I’m not ready.”

Nia held her gaze for what felt like an exceedingly long time, before pulling back another page of notes. “Tell me about the nurse you work with. Ash?”

Her sigh was audible, and the tension in her shoulders loosened as she switched her attention to a relationship shewascapable of having. “Ash is great . . .”

?Chapter 6?

Six hours of appointments had flown by, especially since Colin had scheduled them straight through lunch, so he’d be finished in the early afternoon. It was still strange not being in the office all day, but he wasn’t about to go against the rules as the newest surgeon in the group.

Tossing the messenger bag containing his laptop on the kitchen counter, he looked at the large new boxes that were delivered yesterday. Bookcases for his mother’s books and the framed photos that always accompanied them in his father’s house—thanks to his reduced hours, he had all afternoon to assemble them.

Restlessness streaked up his forearms. “Maybe a short run first.”

After changing into his running clothes, he headed out in the direction of the Commons. Generally, he didn’t run there because the paths wound and intersected too much. It forced him to pay attention to his route and dodge people rather than relax into the run and mentally process his day. Today, he didn’t feel like thinking about what waited for him in his condo.

He warmed up running down Charles Street and turned left when he entered the park. On this early October day, the park was a blaze of yellow, red, and orange. The sight brought a smile to his face as he relaxed into his quick cadence, the crisp breeze pushing over his exposed skin. This time of year reminded him of the multiple times he and Max camped in the Smoky Mountains, building fires to stay warm and sleeping under the stars.

Weaving through the paved paths, the leaves sounded with a satisfying crunch beneath each footfall. After he crossed to the gardens side of the park and passed the ducklings statue, the long brunette plait of the woman walking ahead of him looked familiar. He gave her a wide berth as he raced past, but glanced quickly to his right to confirm that it was the nurse who he’d run into in his building a week ago.

Emilie.

Usually learning the names of all the support staff he worked with was a challenge, but the minute she spoke her name, it seared into his memory.

She had a large leather shoulder bag on her left arm and dark sunglasses. A cord climbed from the purse and diverged at her chin with earbuds resting in the center of her ears. From the brief pass, he could hear that she was on the phone with someone.

Colin decided to loop this smaller side of the park again, and when he came full circle, he found himself looking for her quilted green barn jacket. She was several yards away, strolling very slowly through a tree-lined portion of the park. The cord from her purse was put away, and she was gazing above at the mesmerizing foliage. He slowed his pace, so he could observe her serene grin as her face tilted towards the color-wrapped branches above her.

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