Page 4 of Vicious Sentiments

“Get whatever you want,” his husky voice is just for me and there is a sincerity in his eyes that makes me mindlessly nod.

His wallet is like a bomb in my hand and it feels wrong. My cheeks heat and I quickly dip my head to hide them behind my hair.

“Hey,” his voice is low and he slips a hand under my chin, grabbing my eyes. “It’s okay. I promise. Get whatever you want.”

When I return to the counter with a simple bottle of water, Julian sighs but doesn’t say anything. I try to hand him back the wallet to pay, but he shakes his head.

“You pay him.” He nods to the wallet.

Embarrassed, I open the bi-fold and freeze at the stacks of the one-hundred-dollar bills inside. I hesitate. Am I supposed to pay for one bottle of water with a nice, clean, and crisp hundred-dollar bill? I look up to Julian for confirmation, and he nods. Gingerly, I thumb out one and slide it over the counter, a slight tremor in my hand that I can’t control.

I’ve never held any bill larger than a twenty and there are at least enough hundreds in his wallet to make maybe five-thousand. No wonder the wallet feels like a brick.

“Cash is king,” Julian says as if noticing my awe. “Now about that phone.” He looks at Fred.

I try to hand back the wallet once I tuck the change inside, but Julian places a hand over mine. “Hold onto it. We have more shopping to do.”

Chapter Three

My guard is falling faster than I’m okay with, but he didn’t try anything in the motel room that I stupidly followed him into. In my defense, I really don’t want to go home and lose the feelings Julian elicits in me. They will be quickly buried beneath the smell of my dad’s alcohol and drunk ramblings until Kyle shows up to apologize with his forceful entry into my body. No, I don’t want that yet. I’m gripping onto the ease of Julian with all I have.

Right along with his wallet that I’m terrified to lose. It’s tucked into the pocket of a new jacket he bought me and nestled next to a new phone he also bought. I tried to say no, but he explained the need with such logic that I crumpled.

It’s getting cold, you need a jacket.

Everyone has a phone, it makes me feel weird that you don’t.

It’s late afternoon now that all the errands are done, and he’s led me to a restaurant I’ve never eaten at before. It’s Bridgerock’s version of a steakhouse, and Julian seemed deterred at the storefront until I told him that it’s as nice as he will get here.

We’re sitting in the dim lighting across from each other, and I can’t help but feel a little self-conscious. Even though he’s wearing the same clothes as last night, he did freshen up in the motel room. He still seems put together, and I’m just a mess in a new jacket. Not tomention, he’s older, and I’m very much younger. That alone should have already sent me running, but there’s nothing this man can take advantage of that I haven’t already lost. Unless…

“You aren’t a pimp, are you?” I blurt it out and then smack a hand over my mouth. I can’t believe I accidentally let that slip. I must be tired.

His eyes go wide for a moment and then he laughs.

“I really want to take offense to that but I suppose… I mean, what else are you supposed to think?” He stops laughing and slowly frowns. “No. I’m not apimpor a… sex trafficker.” He winces. “Oh god, that sounds awful. You don’t feel like I’m keeping you here, right?” He leans in. “I just…” his voice lowers. “You’re–” his words seem on the tip of his tongue but then he shakes his head and leans back. “Sorry.”

“For what?” I curiously ask.

“For almost saying what I almost said.” He takes a sip of the iced tea he ordered.

“What…” I gulp, unsure and afraid of what he’s going to reveal. “What were you going to say?”

“Things I shouldn’t say to a seventeen-year-old.” He smirks.

A pleasant tingle hits me and I blush, casting my head down.

“Don’t do that.” He sets his glass down and leans back in the leather booth.

“Do what?”

“Hide your face.”

My cheeks burn even worse and I can’t help but look down again. I hear him sigh but it’s not an impatient sigh, it sounds sad. I don’t like it, so I look up.

He stares at me, a smile slowly working its way up his cheeks till the sight makes me blush again. I get the urge to hide behind my hair but I resist. I really hope I haven’t made a mistake.

Chapter Four

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