Page 30 of Vicious Sentiments

“Hey!” Marney says.

“Not you, Dear. I know you’re more mature than anyone else.”

Marney smirks and reaches for another tortilla. I can’t help but agree with Margo. Marney doesn’t seem to have a single qualm aboutsitting at a table with three warring men, yet I’m eyeing the exit like a caged rat.

“Hailey, Peach…” Margo singles me out. “We’re a tight family, tighter than most, but we aren’t about excluding anyone. Julian has made it clear that he wants you here.”

I look up to Julian, who nods assuredly, and my heart skips a beat.

“But I think you need to know what you are getting yourself into first.” She somberly flicks her gaze to Cape. “Just because Julian wants you here doesn’t mean you have to stay.”

“I want her to stay too,” Marney pipes in.

“I know. I know.” Margo bats her hand at Marney and then studies me. “Julian said you were with him when he delivered a package.”

I’m not sure if I’m expected to lie or confirm. Everyone’s eyes are on me, and I feel a heat creeping up my neck. I knew I was witness to something sketchy but I didn’t see much, so why do I feel like I’m being tested?

“Dumbass,” Cape says, and I know he’s talking to Julian.

“It’s okay,” Margo says. “I’m just curious what you think you saw.”

I tear at my bottom lip with my teeth. “Nothing. Not really,” I say. “I mean…” I look up to Julian for help and he nods. “I just saw a gun. But it was really dark, and I don’t even know what they traded.”

Margo raises a high brow. “And you didn’t go running at the sight? I’ll give it to you, Peach. You’re braver than me.”

“It was Julian holding the gun. I didn’t see the others with one,” I say.

“Oh, believe me, they had guns.” She chuckles. “But you weren’t scared of Jules?”

Was I being stupid? Probably. A stranger pulled out a gun from a hidden compartment, and I didn’t even flinch. But I didn’t feel like Julian was the threat. I had left that back in Bridgerock.

“No,” I say.

“Because you aren’t scared of guns or you aren’t scared of Jules?”

My palm is sweating in Julian’s hand under the table. I don’t want to tell her that I have no reason to fear guns, that they are just one of Death’s toys. The past few days the urge to find her painless embrace has waned, but hasn’t left my mind entirely. Why fear a gun when it’s one and the same?

“Both,” I finally say, realization hitting me in the chest. I’m not afraid of Julian either. With or without a gun.

Dillon rolls his eyes.

“Okay then.” Margo blows out a breath. “The thing is, there’s just no possible way for you to be here and be in the dark. I won’t whisper in my own home. You understand that right?”

I nod.

“So I’ll tell you what we do. But only if you want to stay.”

The air clogs in my chest. Whatever they do got Cape’s fiance killed. Do I want to stay knowing that? Death may not scare me but what if there is more pain involved? The only thing more worrisome than that, is not having Julian. His hand in mine. The look in his eyes when I slapped the woman at the restaurant. The utter lack of fear he causes in me. Would there ever be another man I would feel safe with?

“I want to stay,” I say.

Chapter Twenty

Despite how comfy the bed is, I can’t sleep. I tiptoe down the staircase and slip out the back, pausing to take a blanket from one of the chairs.

It’s probably close to two a.m. and I dig my feet into the cold sand. There isn’t a single other person in sight, and nothing but inky darkness as far as my eye can see. The only way I know the ocean is there is because of the waves curling up the shore.

I just couldn’t stop replaying what Margo had said.International. Guns. Hundreds of thousands.I know that’s a thing—legally, I mean. The gun trading industry is something the government controls and contracts out for, but Margo didn’t mention if what they did was legal. But she didn’t say it was illegal either. Though, I’m guessing it was implied since she said they typically don’t get their hands dirty, and have others in their network that handle most of the coordinating.