Page 102 of Golden Burn

My pulse races, the night sky threatens to swallow all the light Etta transferred to me during our time here. Even the mention of her existence from someone else’s mouth makes me paranoid as shit and utterly desperate to protect her. “That’s none of your fucking business.”

“I’ll take that as a yes, then,” he replies, keeping his voice neutral. “Look, your attempts to hide your emotions during the wedding were decent, at best, but not foolproof. I believe you are a smart man, Mr. Bolt. You have already been hurt by the Lombardos once before. I do not believe you would let it happen again. So, instead of ruining your future with your new wife, I think you should let them go. Hand them over. Wash your hands clean.”

“That seems like a bold request, considering the DEA didn’t give a shit about them, even when they knew they’d murdered my wife.”

“The bureau is not perfect. Nothing is. But I want to see them brought to justice. I want the greed and the violence to come to an end, too.”

The wind caresses my cheek, cooling the ruined skin over my missing eye. Martin makes a nice little speech. But he hasn’t gotten his hands dirty like I have. He hasn’t seen the type of carnage they leave in their wake when they don’t get their way.

“Sounds nice and all, but you’re one man, and the Lombardos are a corporation. They’ll keep coming back again and again, and if they discover I’m a snitch, they will do exactly what they did to my previous wife to my new one. I can’t risk that.”

“Do you plan to keep her with you, Mr. Bolt? Do you plan to bring her into that world or hide her from it?”

No answer comes to mind. Nothing but despair at having to separate myself from Etta or let her stand beside me, her chest exposed to the firing squad.

“You have money, Mr. Bolt, but you have never been in the spotlight. I don’t think you want to be. If you work with us, if you reveal everything to the DEA, we can help you go into hiding, change your name, and protect your wife. Live a different life, one free from blood and pain.”

“That’s a dream. Not reality.”

“Only if you believe it to be,” Martin says, pausing for effect before continuing. “I assure you; the Lombardoscanbe brought to justice the correct way.Youcan find peace and your family will have a fresh start. Think on it.” Martin hangs up and the silence he leaves behind is loud. Deafening.

Peace? Does he know how this world works? Does he know that when happiness becomes a significant part of your life, it only means that your days are numbered, your soul has been marked to endure suffering when the time is right?

“Odin?” Etta calls from within the bedroom, her voice small and distant.

I’m tempted to throw my phone into the sea at the bottom of the hill. Maybe then my body wouldn’t weigh so heavily. Maybe then my head would be clearer.

But it won’t fix it. That’s my job and my job alone.

In the bedroom Etta is awake and searching for me. She reaches out her hands, pulling me against her. “I missed you,” she whispers into my ear when I wrap my arms around her slim shoulders. “Even in my dreams, I miss you.”

“Etta…” I groan, letting my weight fall on top of her. I know she’s strong enough to catch me. It shouldn’t be that way. And yet, with her,it always is. She’s the hero who saves the damsel. “Your heart’s too big for this world.”

She chuckles, sleepy and wistful. “No, it’s not. It’s just the perfect size formyworld.” She kisses my neck, my cheek. “And yours.”

I slip under the sheets, feeling like I’m floating, and Etta is the wings to give me direction. I’ve worn gold on my face for ten years and never once felt like I deserved it, not until she stood before me and reflected back into my soul.

The wind outside builds in intensity, flinging the drapes around like they're dancing. Etta rubs her hand along my naked chest, resting her palm above my heart. I think she might go back to sleep until her fingers travel lower to the strip of hair leading to my groin.

“I’m not tired anymore,” she murmurs suggestively.

“Me, neither.”

We make love till dawn.

38

Etta

‘Gotten’ - Slash ft Adam Levine

“Ithink we should go to Delos.”

“The island?”

I show Odin the phone screen and the list of activities I googled for us to do on our last night. I’m lying on the daybeds out near the pool, while Odin does some sort of core workout. It’s the definition of eye candy. “The island of Delos is a UNESCO world heritage site and one of the most important archaeological finds in the modern century.” I show him some pictures and the event that’s happening tonight. “Sit immersed in an ancient amphitheater and behold the wonder of Greek theater in its natural setting.Wow. That sounds amazing.”

Odin hums, continuing to balance in a plank position, his forehead dripping sweat.

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