Page 34 of Crave

I’d look at her as more, if I thought it wouldn’t mess things up.

But I’ve seen my father and his girl friends. He beat them like he did me.

Lara has dated a lot of guys.

Most treated her poorly, so I removed them. No one deserves to live who treats her badly.

She must have gone farther than I thought.

Carrying the cake in one hand, I push into the thicker trees, hoping to catch a glimpse of her blond hair between the trunks.

I can’t seem to find her.

Zig zagging through the forest, I pick up speed.

I want to surprise her, but how can I if she’s winning at hiding?

Fine.

“Lara? Are you out here? Come back to the party, pchelka.” I know it gets to her when I call her a Russian name.

Maybe she’s cranky enough it will make her yell at me, and I’ll catch her.

“Lara?” Worry starts to gnaw at me.

Pausing, all I can hear is my heartbeat, and the distant sound of the music playing back at my circus.

The whole thing is for her.

Where is she?

“Lara? I’m sorry, please come out?” There’s a set of low bushes. I bet she went in there.

Putting the plate on the ground, I crouch and push through the thicket to find nothing but a balled up garter snake.

“Have you seen Lara?” I call after him as he leaves.

I might as well be talking to Sheila.

Or Percy. But I doubt my motorcycle can tell me where she is either.

Would she leave completely? Did she cut back to the road and then walk around to her car?

Surely I’d have seen her leave.

No, I better check.

I’m halfway there when I remember the cake.

Fuck.

Running through the woods, I find it already covered in ants.

It’s ruined. She’s gone. The day is a failure.

Shit.

Turning back, I head towards where everyone is. Sitting on the picnic table, it’s hard to be happy when she’s not here.

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