Page 179 of Crave

Sometimes I feel like a kid with them checking in on my food intake, but I understand after starting my therapy that it’s because they care.

I scared them. And myself.

I never wanted to die. I don’t want to leave them, I couldn’t.

My family and Alexei are everything. I just lost control.

My eating habits were the only thing that made me feel like I wasn’t spiraling, even if it was slowly killing me.

But it’s something I’m going to have to manage for the rest of my life. There is no magic fix here.

We’re just taking it one step at a time.

“Are you okay?”

I look up at Nikolai and rush into his arms. We aren’t a cuddly family, but he sure does make me feel safe.

“Today, you marry that crazy man downstairs that makes you so happy. You’re getting better, we’re searching for Mikhail. We’ve all got your back. We always have and we always will. You hear me?”

I squeeze him tighter. “I miss Mikhail.”

“That makes two of us. You know him, whatever the hell he’s up to, he’ll be safe. Have faith in his brutal ass.”

I can’t help but laugh.

I’ve seen him at his worst. He’s scary as hell. But a heart of gold.

“We better get going before those damn flamingos run rampant and get us all kicked out.”

I roll my eyes.

“They aren’t house trained. But they do listen to Alexei.”

He chuckles. “They understand broken English I guess.”

“They must.”

CHAPTER 89

ALEXEI

“I cannot believeyou dressed up your flamingos and brought them to your wedding. You’re lucky we own this place.”

I stroke the top of Sheila’s head and she rests against my bicep.

“They love me and Lara. They are our babies, I couldn’t leave them at home.”

Jax takes a wary step past Bruce.

“I swear that thing hissed at me.” He scratches the back of his head, eyeing the bird.

I shrug.

“Maybe I’m training him up to be security at one of Enzo’s clubs.”

Enzo rolls his eyes.

“Why not. If he can scare Jax, he’s doing something right.”