Page 96 of Stuck in Paradise with You

‘Are we good, Carrie? I promise, if I’m ever going to try to get you and Luke in the same place again, I’ll be upfront about it.’

She briefly looks at me, where I’m standing a little way in front of the group now, having wandered with my hands in my pockets, kicking up dirt with my toes, because I feel like a petulant child so I’m acting like one. A child whose favorite soft toy has been taken away and can’t imagine ever sleeping without it.

‘We’re good,’ she tells Joe. ‘And I’ll bring Eric up to speed with everything when I get back. He’ll be in touch.’

‘For the record,’ Joe says, ‘Eric has been our point of contact at the firm for a long time but you never missed a step, Carrie. I know I had an ulterior motive for bringing you here but your advice was great and I’ll feed that back to Rachel.’

‘Thank you.’

They hug again, then the sound of the chopper is drawing closer. ‘Well, goodbye, everyone, and good luck with everything. If I can support from New York, you must let me know, okay?’

Finally, she’s walking toward me, as the chopper comes firmly into view across my shoulder, getting louder and louder on its approach.

We face each other, a little way from the group, her luggage like an unwanted interruption on the floor by her feet. Suddenly, all my rehearsed words and sensible thoughts from today have gone.

41

CARRIE

I can barely hear Luke above the sound of the helicopter that’s now so close, it’s bringing down something like a hurricane of wind, dirt blowing up from the ground around us, as if we haven’t had enough of late.

‘I can’t hear you!’ I shout to Luke, despite being less than a yard away from him.

I don’t know what I was expecting but I didn’t expect this week to end like this. Rushed. Too quick. Unplanned. It’s not like I knew what I would say to him at the end of this week. What I would have said at the beginning of the week versus now are probably quite different, yet neither would be fully correct or true to how I’m feeling.

Because I’m feeling like Iamglad that Joe manipulated me into being here.

Like I don’t hate Luke anymore. Quite the opposite.

Like I miss him already and I’m standing right in front of him.

But also… like it can’t count as serendipity if Joe arranged our meeting after all these years. It wasn’t the universe sending us a message, or even chance.

And I don’t know how I’ll feel when I get back to New York. What I’ll say to Rachel, how I’ll explain this. What Callum and my mom will think if, after all the hours I’ve spent down about Luke leaving me previously, I tell them I want him back.

Closure. That’s what Callum told me after I slept with Luke.

It was just closure.

I’ve worked hard to set the record straight and get my life and career to where they were just a week ago.

But when Joe just whispered in my ear that the one thing money can’t buy is true love, my mind went straight to Luke.

Luke yells his words again, leaning closer to me as the helicopter descends to the helipad. ‘I said, can I bee too en I get pack to New York?’

I glance to the fast-whirring propellers, to the door that’s opening and the pilot who’s giving a thumbs-up signal to Joe.

‘I can’t hear you!’ I virtually scream in order to be heard.

Then Luke is looking at my mouth, and I’m staring at his, and I’m willing him to kiss me but I’m also reticent because Joe Hettich is right across my shoulder. So I thrust my arms around him and he squeezes me tightly against him.

Then we part and all I can think is,That’s it. That’s how this ends. It’s how it has to end because… because… because of my job.

I’m running to the chopper with one bag as Luke jogs with my suitcase and hoists it inside.My job? Is that it now? Is that all that stands between Luke and me and potential happiness?

At some point, I’ve climbed inside the helicopter and someone has put earmuffs on me and strapped me in and I’m staring out of the window as the helicopter starts to rise. I don’t need to wipe my cheek to know that a silent tear is rolling down it.

We’ve explained the past away. We’ve apologized to each other for our mistakes.

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