Page 98 of Three to Fall

I chuckled, instinctively knowing he and Alice would have gotten on like a house on fire if they’d ever had the chance to meet. It still hurt my heart she’d never got to see this. Me and Hayley Jade happy. Settled. In a home with people who loved us. Who would have loved her too.

I felt myself slipping into grief and anger again, but this time I pulled myself out, not wanting to linger there. “I know most of you didn’t know her, but—”

“Doesn’t matter. She’s family.” Aloha winked at me. “So we’re going to throw her the party of the century. One so fucking big and loud she’ll hear it from wherever the fuck Heaven is.”

I laughed when everyone else cheered. Hayden grabbed a notepad from the table and started jotting down ideas for food.

Queenie stole a piece of paper from his notepad and took a pen from her huge, messy bun. “What sort of music did she like? I’ll put a playlist together.”

“I don’t think she would have known any popular music.” I cringed, hating she’d never really gotten to have that simple pleasure. “Just pick whatever your favorites are.”

“Cardi B it is then!”

I didn’t know what a Cardi B was, but if it made Queenie happy then I was sure I’d love it too.

Hawk called out to Hayden. “Toss me my phone. I’ll call Ice. Tell him to be back from the Louisiana chapter in time and to bring back some of that rum from the distillery they have there. He can organize flowers too. He used to bang a girl from the flower shop.”

War glanced over at the mention of the Louisiana chapter. “Is he still there? What the fuck is taking Riot so long to get those guns he owes us?”

Hawk shook his head. “I dunno. Ice has been waiting around there for a week. Riot is just wasting all of our time at this point.” He punched something onto his screen, presumably bringing up Ice’s phone number, and held the phone to his ear, waiting for Ice to answer.

War pressed his lips into a hard line. “Tell Ice to tell Riot that he’ll be dealing with me rather than my prospect if Ice isn’t back on the road with those guns in time for the funeral. Riot can pay for the rum as compensation for wasting my fucking time, so tell Ice to buy a fucking lot of it.”

“You know it.” Hawk turned away to take the call somewhere quieter.

Everyone found themselves with something to organize, pitching in, leaning on their strengths and contacts, coming together as a family was supposed to.

Rebel nudged me with her hip, her hands resting on her growing baby bump. “I got Queenie to add some Paramore to her playlist.”

I tried to smile at the mention of Rebel’s favorite band. “I would expect no less than three songs.”

“Good, because I picked five.”

I loved that. “Perfect.”

Her smile fell away. “It gets easier. With time. The missing them.”

I breathed out slowly, sure she meant Alice, but it wasn’t just her I felt like I was saying goodbye to. It was my sisters left behind, and my parents as well. “I hope so. I just wish Mom had come with us. Naomi and Samantha too.”

“It’s okay to let them go, you know? Not just Alice, but your mom and sisters too. You did everything you could. Their decisions are theirs. You aren’t responsible for saving them.”

“I know.”

“But you wish you could have saved them anyway?” She sighed. “Honestly, I don’t know how I ended up surrounded by so many people with savior complexes. You fit in well here, you do know that, right? You’re all a danger to yourselves. Your New Year’s resolution should be to be more selfish. You know there’s a cake in the refrigerator? You could just go eat the whole thing and not share a bit.”

I hid a laugh. “But I’d feel awful nobody else got to enjoy it.”

She rolled her eyes. “You’re proving my point. Sometimes it’s okay to eat the whole cake.”

I squinted at her. “Wouldn’t that give you a really bad stomachache? I think I’d be vomiting for days.”

She screwed up her face, considering it. “Okay, I think my metaphor got a little off track. Vomiting was definitely not the point.”

“What was?”

“I really don’t know. This pregnancy has turned my brain to mush. Or maybe it’s the having four kids under five? I don’t think I’ve slept more than two hours at a time since the twins were born.”

I reached out and put my hand on her belly. Instantly, her little baby gave my hand a solid kick, trying to remove the weight. I grinned. “I can’t wait until I can feel mine.”

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