Page 49 of Sweetest Hate

As he worked, I soaked up the sun while stretched out on my towel, enjoying the quiet. It was a special kind of magic with the waves, seagulls, and other sounds drifting around us that also seemed peaceful.

"All done." Kellan sat back an hour later, settling the finished picture in his lap.

I sat up and leaned into his space to get a good look. It didn't come as a surprise that I was once again impressed with his skill. "Anyone lucky enough to snag one of your pieces is—" When I glanced at Kellan, I hadn't realized how close we now sat. Facing me, his lips were so near to mine, and my gaze dropped to his mouth, where his teeth sank into his fuller lower lip.

"Arsen? Lucky enough to what?" His voice shook, and I knew he was thinking the same thing I was.

Instead of answering his question, I reached up and cradled the back of his head and I closed the distance, dusting my lips over his. His breath coasted over my mouth as I placed a barely-there kiss and tugged his lip with my teeth. "Kiss me back," I whispered against his lips, and Kellan made a sound in his throat, a whisper-moan as he opened for me. Slipping my tongue along his, we met in a tangle of slow, languid, and searching caresses. I wasn't sure exactly what we were searching for, but somehow I knew I'd found whatever it was that I needed in Kellan. I'd never kissed that way. I'd never wanted to. Even as the need for air forced us apart, it felt like I was truly breathing for the first time.

As we separated, I stared into his eyes, searching yet again for the answer to a question I didn't understand.

Kellan broke the silence. "I came out to my parents this morning."

That hadn't been what I expected him to say at all, and I sensed he needed to talk about it. "How did that go?"

"Fine." He shrugged. "They were cool about it, actually, which I think I already knew they would be. Somehow my coming-out moment segued into them flirt-arguing over my dad's intentional hearing loss, and Satan's asshole was brought up."

I choked on a laugh. "Wow."

"Yeah, they are kind of insane." Kellan's lips twitched.

"Serious question." I paused, briefly considering that if I asked him to open up would I be willing to do the same. His blue eyes locked on mine, and I found settling over me that same peace I'd noticed growing more and more frequent when I was around him. "When did you realize you were gay?"

He bit his lip and then shrugged. "I guess I've always known, though I tried to ignore it for a while. When we were kids, Quinn and I were kind of scrawny and geeky. Girls weren't really a factor. Then as we got older, Quinn would talk about girls, and it just never interested me. I never felt any kind of attraction to them. Then one summer, we were swimming at the community pool with some friends, and the boys' swim coach was standing on the deck talking to some of his team. He was tall—"

"Okay, I get it. You were hot for the coach." Which I could have done without knowing.

Kellan laughed. "Fine. From that point, I guess I just accepted it but didn't share that information with anyone but Quinn. At least until we went to college. I don't try to hide it on campus, but here…" He took a deep breath, processing the memories, I guessed. Then he asked, "What about you? When did you figure out you were gay?"

"High school, but I'll spare you the details, unlike you." I glared, and he grinned which only made me more comfortable in his presence.

"My turn for a question." He adjusted his position to face me completely. "What's the deal with your dad?"

I really didn't want to talk about either of my parents, but I'd started by diving into personal shit. I owed him. He had, however, asked about my dad and not my mom, so I was claiming that loophole in the clause. I sighed. "My dad wasn't always a self-absorbed asshole. I can remember when I was little, and he took me on fishing trips, but some things happened, and he stopped being my dad. I was looked after by babysitters, and when he was around, he'd lock himself away in his office. He became single-minded, focused on his business. I just sort of fell through the cracks, I guess."

"I'm sorry you grew up that way." Kellan's expression morphed into a mixture of anger and empathy, which I found hard to accept, so I just shrugged.

I was also way deeper in my feels than I was comfortable with. "You ready to get out of here?"

He frowned, and I knew questions had to be circling around that creative brain of his. I leaned forward and placed a quick kiss on his lips. I stood and brushed off my shorts. He held out the painting for me to hold as he put away his things and zipped his bag. When I reached down for him, he grabbed my hand and allowed me to pull him to his feet.

"Thanks for bringing me here." He shouldered his bag.

"Kidnapped and everything, huh?" I grinned, and he snorted.

"We'll have to talk about how you approach dates in the future." He climbed off the rock, and I gathered our towels.

"Nah, this one turned out okay."

He laughed, and it was a sound I wished I could carry with me everywhere. As we headed back up the beach toward my car, I had the sudden realization that I did want to date Kellan. And I had no idea how he'd react if I told him or how it would possibly work when we both had plans that would separate us by several states soon.

Seventeen

Kellan

In a tangle of limbs,Arsen and I tumbled through the back door, making a direct path to the guest room he was staying in. He kicked the door closed as soon as we stepped inside and reached back, pulling his t-shirt over his head.

I watched as his hands drifted down to the boardshorts he wore. He tugged at the band, letting them fall to the floor. Arsen stood before me, naked, then he reached down and stroked his hard cock.

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