Page 63 of Mine for a Moment

I freeze, my heart squeezing painfully. “Don’t do this,” I beg. “Serenity, please don’t do this.”

She reaches for my tie and loosens it, the way she has countlesstimes, but this time, there’s a deep sadness in her eyes that makes me wonder if this is the last time I’ll get to experience her hands on me like this.

“She needs you more than I do, Archer. The sneaking around, the guilt, I can’t take it. I feel like I’m your mistress, and I’m hurting her by coveting what never would’ve been mine if not for that stupid list I made. You waited for her for so long, and all that time, she was waiting for you too,prayingfor you. I just can’t…I can’t do this to her. I couldn’t live with myself if I did.”

“No, Serenity. I waited for her because I feltguilty, because she disappeared during a trip I should’ve accompanied her on. If you’re going to end things with me, then let’s at least be honest about the facts. I don’t love her, nor do I want to be with her. She’s a friend I care about deeply, but that’s all she is to me. You walking away from our relationship won’t change that.”

I place my index finger underneath her chin and force her to face me, my eyes on hers. “So tell me the truth, Sera. Are you leaving me for him? Tell me what’s going on in that beautiful mind of yours. Explain it to me because there’s no way in hell I’ll let you go without a fight.”

“I’m ending things between us for all the reasons we initially decided we’d never be together. There was already so much at stake for us, but the stakes are even higher now. We only just got Tyra back, and I can’t lose her again. If she ever found out about us, it’d destroy her. There’s no future for us. There’s no outcome where you and I get to be happy without hurting anyone else. You see that, don’t you? Us being togetherhurtsothers. Could you really live with yourself knowing how selfish we’ve been and how much pain we’ve caused? I can’t, Archer. I can’t do it. I won’t be the reason one of the women I love most doesn’t overcome the greatest tragedy she’s ever experienced.”

I stare at her, taking in her resolute expression despite the tearsin her eyes. There’s no changing her mind, and it fucking kills me to know she’s right. Walking away is the right thing to do, but nothing has ever felt more wrong.

Fifty-Three

Archer

“Are you okay?” Tyra asks as I put on my shoes, feeling numb. I’ve barely slept, my mind replaying Serenity’s words over and over again, torturing me endlessly. “You were twisting and turning all night. Is it…is it uncomfortable to sleep next to me? I’m sorry, Archer. I just…I just feel so safe when you’re with me. That night they brought me here was the first time I slept through the night since—”

She’s trembling, almost as though she’s scared to speak up, to voice her worries. My heart squeezes painfully as I straighten, throwing her the sweetest smile I can muster. “I’m fine, I promise. Just a bit tired.”

She steps closer, and I freeze when she straightens my tie for me. “I know you better than I know myself,” she says, her voice breaking. “I notice the way you tense just slightly every time I touch you, almost like you’re trying not to recoil. I know something happened yesterday and that you’re upset, and I really hate that you’re trying to hide it from me. I just…I just want to forget, and I want things to be the way they used to be. I want to be the person you talk to when you’re worried, the one you instinctively reach for, but I…”

Guilt twists its knife in my heart, and I hesitate before wrapping my hands around her arms. “I just don’t want to add to your mental load,” I tell her when, deep down, I wish I could remind her that we broke up before she went missing, and going back to what we used to have is just going to make both of us unhappy. I’d never say it, but the words are constantly on the tip of my tongue. I keep them under lock and key, reminding myself over and over again that it’d hurt her unnecessarily, all for a tiny reprieve of the guilt I’m feeling, and it isn’t worth it. She deserves my support in whatever way she needs it, and I need to do better.

“I’ll heal,” she tells me. “My mind isn’t broken, I swear. I’ll probably never dance again, and maybe I won’t ever be the girl I was before, but with you by my side, I can overcome my fears, and I can learn to live again. The only reason I’m still here is because I’ve fought to survive that hellhole, and I’ll continue fighting, for myself, for us. So please…don’t give up on me, Arch, and don’t coddle me either. Don’t treat me like I’m breakable.”

“I’m not trying to coddle you,” I murmur, gently tucking her hair behind her ear. “If anything, I’m in awe of your strength, Tyra. I’m proud of you, and I’m just trying to support you in the best way I can. Tell me, sweetheart. What do you need?”

She places her hand against my chest, right over my heart, and it instantly reminds me of Serenity. Just like that, pure agony rushes through me, and I do my best to school my features, to focus on Tyra instead of the memory of Serenity ending things with me. It’s near impossible for me not to recoil at her touch when deep down, I know that she’s the only reason Serenity walked away. Ultimately, Serenity chose Tyra over me, and I can’t even blame her for it.

“I just need you,” she says, her voice soft, hopeful. “I need you to treat me like you used to.”

I nod hesitantly, unsure I can give her what she’s asking for yet entirely unable to deny her when it’s clear it took courage for her to even voice her needs. “I’ll do my best,” I whisper.

She nods and steps back, and I force a smile before walking out the door, hating myself for my own selfishness. I should follow Serenity’s wishes and example by putting Tyra first, but all I want to do is beg my girlfriend not to leave me, the whole world be damned. I’m not the man Serenity thinks I am, but fuck, I have to try to be. It’s all I can think about on the way to work. I need to do the right thing and be there for Tyra. She was there for me during one of the hardest parts of my life, and I have to be there for her in the same way. I owe it to her.

“Archer?”

My heart soars at the sound of Serenity’s voice, and I pause halfway to my office, hope blossoming in my chest. “Hi,” I murmur, drinking her in. She’s fucking gorgeous today, in that cream blouse and black pencil skirt, and it hurts to look at her knowing she’s no longer mine.

“Mr. Harrison,” she corrects herself, shaking her head. “Could I have a word, please?”

I tense, forcing myself into the professional role she expects me to play as I lead her to my office, my heart hammering in my chest. Did she change her mind? Did she toss and turn all night like I did, realizing that being together secretly is better than not being together at all?

She walks into my office and pauses halfway into the room when I close the door behind me. Serenity turns to face me, and for the first time in a very long time, I can’t read her expression. She doesn’t smile the way she normally does when we’re alone, and she doesn’t look at me that way I like, like she knows I belong to her.

“I’m resigning.”

My stomach drops, and I take a step toward her. “No.” I can’t lose her entirely. I need these little glimpses of her. I need our conversationsand little excuses to drive her home so I get her to myself for just a few moments.

“I’ve already put in my two-week notice, and I’m moving out too. I know Ezra is moving back into his own place soon, but I’m not moving with him. I’m leaving, and I wanted you to hear it from me.”

“Serenity,” I murmur, helplessness rushing through me as I lift my hand to her face. “Don’t leave me. Please, don’t do this.”

Her expression cracks, and I take a step closer to her, thankful that she’s letting me. “I can’t be here and watch you with her. I know it’s exactly what I’m asking you to do, but my heart can’t take it, Archer. I can’t be around to watch you get over me and rekindle what you lost.”

I pull her against me, reveling in the feel of her body against mine. “I’ll never get over you, Serenity. This thing between us is what I’ve always been searching for, what was missing in every relationship before you. You leaving won’t change that.”

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