Page 10 of Mutant Mine

His tone is off. When I turn to look at the man, his eyes flick nervously to Roth’s cell and back again a couple of times, as if he wishes he hadn’t spoken.

Stick up for himself…

Hatha, using Roth to humiliate me yesterday.

Hatha, who never seemed like someone who would try torun. When running makes no sense — trapped on a ship full of armed guards, in open space, with nowhere else to go.

Hatha, who died last night.

Now all the prisoners are quiet and afraid. And they won’t look at Roth.

My eyes slide up to his in horror. Roth is looking back at me, quite calm.

“What did you do?” I whisper.

With a wave of nausea, I remember the early hours of this morning, and the flashes of his body that had crept into my heated mind. I guess Hatha was right: I’m a freak for wanting Roth. I can admit that I find him attractive, in a confusing, overwhelming way — but I should never have let that physical desire trick me into thinking, even for a second, that he deserved my sympathy.

You can’t control who you’re attracted to. Acting on it is the bit you can control. And feeling attraction to someone, even really intense attraction, doesn’t make them a good person or a good idea.

What matters is what your brain says. And your heart. And your gut. And basically any body part except whatever you’ve got between your legs. That thing cannot be trusted.

Right now, what’s my brain telling me? That Roth isn’t beautiful. He’s amonster.And this time, as his eyes hold mine, the only shiver that runs down my spine is pure, cold fear.

He opens his mouth, but I’ll never know what he would have said, because just at that moment:

“What the fuck are you doing?”

Gregory is standing in the corridor behind me, with a face like thunder. I suddenly realize the position I have been frozen in: one hand resting on Roth’s cell drawer, which still holds the illicit pot of porridge.

“What thefuck,” Gregory repeats, “Do you think youaredoing?”

“Sir, I—”

He’s shaking his head. “I knew I shouldn’t have given you the benefit of the doubt yesterday. First you fraternized with the prisoners. Now you’re disobeying a direct command, going behind my back, and undermining the discipline of a maximum security inmate who attacked our defenses?”

“That’s not really—”

“Shut it. You’re off duty. Confined to your bunk until further notice. Thiswillgo on your record, Finch, and youwillbe docked pay at the very least — if you don’t face a disciplinary board.” He sneers. “Perhaps I should just tell security to leave you behind on Chronus, too. Some time spent splitting rocks would sort out that attitude.”

I don’t have to worry about that threat for more than half a second. Because suddenly, while Gregory is still stood there panting at me, the lights go out. The ship’s machinery all around us powers down, and the constant background hum of the engine, which we’re so acclimatized to that we don’t even notice it anymore, shuts off.

The silence is shocking.

It’s pitch black. For a moment, you could hear a pin drop.

Then someone shouts: “The force fields are down!”

And all hell breaks loose.

7

Rory

OH HOLYfucking fuck.

There are so many questions flying into my mind, each one crashing into the back of the next: how could this have happened? Is the entire ship down, or just this deck? What should I do?!

But there’s no time to think about any of that. There’s no time to think at all. I just have to act.

---