Page 48 of We Three Kings

‘MAGGIE!’ a voice chimes behind me and it’s Carmel, radiant in a long, sequinned wrap dress, big eighties-style curls finishing off the glamour. ‘You look so pretty!’

‘Likewise, you look amazing, Carmel,’ I say, looking her up and down.

‘And beautiful Miles, how are you? So handsome.’

Carmel is not like her step-daughter, for which I’m glad. She’s warm and invested in people and doesn’t look down at Miles in any way; he’s simply part of her family.

‘I’m good, Carmel. You look radiant.’

‘Don’t be fooled, it’s all these sequins refracting, giving me the good light. Did you forget a shirt, Jassy?’

Jasper sighs. ‘Are you saying I look terrible?’

‘I am saying you look interesting. You are lucky you have such an adorable face though, that pulls it all off.’

He tries not to react but leans in to kiss her on the cheek. ‘You look divine as always, Mum.’

I scrunch up my face to hear him being so sweet to his mum. He needs to bring that into work but I may not say that out loud. Over the way, Cressida’s loud and crass tones can be heard, still harping on to five possibly complete strangers about the estate and how they should come in the summer so they can go swimming in the lake.

‘Has she said hello to you yet?’ Jasper asks her mum.

‘Oh god, no. Leave her be,’ Carmel says. I stand there sipping at my punch, not quite knowing where to look. Doesn’t Carmel live here? ‘You?’ Carmel asks.

‘Oh, she came to try and steal my room, looked Maggie up and down and complained to me about Albert’s kids coming skiing.’

And for the first time since I’ve met her, I see a sadness there in Carmel’s expression. You can sense she’s someone who exudes a lot of light and Cressida is the sort of person who’s mostly shade, who snuffs out flames.

Miles goes over and puts his hand out. ‘Come on, Miss Carmel. Let’s get you a big drink.’

I see a glimmer of a smile from her, letting him know that’s a very good idea. ‘Jasper, make sure you show Maggie the cheese, yes?’ It’s like she already knows me.

We both nod, watching as they link arms and head into the other room. I see Jasper smiling as he watches them.

‘Have they always been that close?’ I ask him.

‘Always. She’s like an aunt of sorts. He’s equally as protective of her,’ he tells me and I watch his continued gaze. I know that look, the way you search for someone in a room.

‘Jasper. I like him. He’s very…’

‘Completely the opposite to me?’ he jokes.

‘Well, there is that…’ I laugh.

He takes a large sip of his drink, his face lit by the roaring fire next to us. ‘I am sorry I never told you about him. He’s very precious to me and we work hard to preserve what we have, and sometimes that just means not letting people in,’ he explains.

It’s a rare moment of sensitivity from Jasper and I can’t help but lean into him and give him a hug.

‘Don’t be daft. I’m starting to understand how the complicated family dynamics make things difficult. But…’ He stands there waiting, possibly for judgement. ‘Not that it means anything, really, but I think the both of you together is a magnificent thing. I want to say I’m an ally without it sounding trite. Just know I’m here.’

‘You stan,’ he jokes.

I laugh and push his shoulder. ‘That. Always.’

He stops for a moment trying to contain his smile and I wish I could frame his face to see him so happy. ‘Well, that means more than you know.’

Don’t cry, Maggie. Because Jasper has let you in. He has trusted you with something very private about him. It just aches that deep down I know I have to make a difficult decision, that maybe that trust and admiration he has for me is misplaced. Maybe I should tell him.

‘Actually. I wanted to talk to you about something,’ I say tentatively.

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