Page 38 of We Three Kings

‘You’ve met the sisters?’ I ask him, as we walk alongside the train.

Jasper peers through carriages to pick a good spot. ‘Once. It was a birthday party for one of them and Frank invited me along as it was after work and the drinks were free. I got drunk and called one of them a harpy. She wasn’t best pleased.’ I’m secretly pleased Jasper took one of Frank’s sisters on. ‘Here,’ he tells me, finding a carriage to his liking and we drag our bags on board as Jasper scurries over to a table seat, beating a group of football fans who had been eyeing it up. We put our bags in the overhead spaces and Jasper unzips his rucksack to reveal his snack haul. He has done well but that is very Jasper. He likes to research proper food venues near us so we eat well in our lunch hours, instead of living off vending machines. Because of him, I now appreciate the wonder of proper ramen as opposed to basic Cup Noodles.

‘Can I give you some money for all this?’ I ask.

‘Don’t be a fool,’ he says bluntly. ‘You told me in a text message that you’d bought gifts for everyone? I really hope not.’

I pull a confused expression. ‘Jasper, it’s Christmas. I couldn’t show up empty-handed to your home. They’re not huge gifts and there are going to be children there. You’ve got to make it special for the kids.’

‘You could have just shared what I’m giving them. What have you got the kids?’

‘Some Lindt reindeer. I didn’t break the bank,’ I explain. Is this him telling me I should have broken the bank? Will they look down at confectionery? I don’t think I’ll get on with those sorts of kids. ‘Actually, you gave me lists of names but I’m still trying to work out who’s who,’ I tell him, reaching into my handbag to retrieve a spreadsheet he gave me. What I liked is that it had descriptors about people, like Uncle Wesley who, in Jasper’s words, “will name-drop, tell you terribly boring fishing stories and generally be an absolute arsehole.”

He looks at his watch. ‘I wouldn’t worry. Tonight is Father’s cocktail party. It’ll be a very random mix of neighbours, family and friends, and half of us won’t really know each other. You brought something to wear, yes?’

I may be wearing the dress from yesterday. Hopefully, he’ll be none the wiser.

‘Just mingle and have fun. My family are many things but they like to throw a party. You can watch as my brother will get incredibly drunk and get out his trumpet.’

‘Is that a euphemism?’

He laughs. ‘No. He plays the trumpet, a cousin will get on the piano and there’ll be a sing-song where my grandmother will show us her vibrato – not a euphemism either.’ He talks about the event like it may be a complete embarrassment. I can picture it not being his scene, being the savage critic in the corner as a ruddy-faced uncle falls over himself. To me, it all sounds like pretty good entertainment.

‘So, your sister is Cressida, your brother is Albert.’

‘Yes, but half siblings.’

‘Oh, so they are older?’

‘Yes. By about ten years. It’s…complicated,’ he tells me as the last passengers run towards the doors and the train whistle sounds. An announcement crackles overhead as the train starts to roll. Jasper thinks that may have been enough distraction for him not to have to tell this story. He is wrong. I gesture for him to continue. ‘Do I have to?’

‘What else are we going to do for an hour?’ I say.

‘Eat pretzels? Drink cocktails in a tin? Sudoku?’ he suggests.

I shake my head.

‘Albert and Cressida’s mother passed away quite sadly, and their father remarried my mother, and that is how I came to exist.’

‘So really not that complicated at all,’ I say, laughing, tearing at that bag of pretzels and diving in. However, there’s a look in his eye which tells me that behind that simple explanation lie some interesting family politics which I am sure I will be witness to in the next couple of days. Maybe for now, it’s best to know the basic setup though. ‘Well, I look forward to meeting them all.’

‘Hmmm, we’ll see,’ he says. ‘I also need to ask a favour.’

The last time someone asked me for a favour, it was Frank asking me to pretend I had an Icelandic grandmother and a cat. Is this favour in the same vein? I’m not sure I have the dramatic power to last a full two days. ‘Go on,’ I say tentatively.

‘I’m going to introduce you to someone this weekend who is very important to me so I wanted to give you a heads-up.’

I nod. His tone makes me think he’s not talking about his mother.

‘His name is Miles.’

I recognise the name. ‘Oh, Miles. Your flatmate, you’ve mentioned himbefore,’ I say.

‘Well, yes, but he’s also my boyfriend,’ he tells me.

I may react strangely at this point. I’ve always been deeply respectful of Jasper’s sexuality but at the same time, he rarely talks of his love life at work and I’ve never wanted to pry so this feels monumental to know this much, so much so that I let out a strange ringing squeal and clap my hands excitedly. People may turn around.

‘I am absolutely mortified, Maggie,’ he tells me in deadpan tones, though he seems quietly amused to see me so excited.

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