Page 57 of Please Hate Me

“You could have gone harder,” she teased. “I was expecting toys or ropes.”

My eyebrow arched as I fought a smile.

“Next time, there will be.” That was a promise.

I stepped into the tub, then hooked an arm around Mason’s waist to keep her steady as she followed me in.

“How do you know therewillbe a next time?” The spark of excitement in Mason’s sleepy eyes damn near killed me.

“Because I want there to be,” I explained, wiping my cum from her chest.

She didn’t argue. Instead, she leaned into me, and my pulse quickened. I thought for a moment she just needed a little extra support. Then she wrapped her arms around my chest. The hug wasn’t tight—her arms couldn’t even reach all the way around me—but it caused butterflies to erupt in my chest.

Mason told me earlier she didn’t like sleeping alone, so I offered to let her sleep in my room with me. She eagerly accepted my offer, along with one of my shirts to wear for the night. Whenshe was all settled, I got up in search of drinks to keep on the nightstand.

The house was dark, but a dim light emanated from the kitchen. I nearly jumped out of my skin when I saw Lucian sitting at the island with a can of diet cola. I crept through the living room and cautiously approached him, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“You need to leave Mason alone.” He spoke to the counter, refusing to look at me.

“… Beg your pardon?”

“I said: you need to leave Mason alone.” Conviction filled his words, though I also sensed a fair amount of anguish. “She’s going through shit; she doesn’t need to be abandoned by her baby daddy twice.”

I sunk into the empty chair beside him.

“This ain’t about Mason, is it?”

Lucian groaned, burying his face in his hands.

“That’s the problem. I don’tknowif it’s about her.”

The chipped black polish on his nails blended into his hair as his fingers wove into his curls.

“Cameron, it feels like I’m going fucking crazy.” His words were slow, and his voice deep. I could tell he was struggling to keep himself calm. “I’m mad at you for getting her pregnant; I’m mad at her for letting you do it... but most of all, I am sofuckingangry that she’s not okay.”

Once, during a particularly sleep-deprived night with the twins, Lucian told me something interesting. In public, he liked to pretend to be a hard ass. He preferred to be pissed at the world—that way, it couldn’t hurt him anymore. He even tried to keep this act up around Sophia. But when it was just us, he let his guard down.

His shoulders shook, and his knuckles went white as he pulled at his hair. I pulled him into my chest, letting his tears collecton my skin. While I loved this side of Lucian, he hated being comforted, so I did my best to ignore the fact that he was literally crying over Mason.

“I shouldn’t be mad at that! She’s the one who left. She ruinedeverythingI had planned, and do you know what’s worse?”

“What?” I asked, trying to keep my voice as soothing as possible.

Lucian looked up, his tears still staining his cheeks.

“If she were to look at me and apologize for leaving… Or worse, if she told me she still loved me, I would be completely unable to prevent myself from wanting more with her.”

Seeing Lucian so vulnerable pulled at my heart, causing it to ache for him. I rested a hand on his cheek, swiping a stray tear with my thumb. He anchored my hand in place before kissing my wrist.

“Please, for the love of God, I need you to tell me I’m being stupid.”

But that was just it. I couldn’t tell him that. The brain may have been the only organ capable of thought, but the heart was the one that was never wrong. If he was aching for her, it was because his soul needed her.

And that’s when I realized I was feeling something similar. It wasn’t enough to reduce me to tears, but something in me made me want to stay by Mason’s side. To care for her in ways I shouldn’t.

I had once read that souls were the remnants of stars that had burnt out. If that was true, I was pretty sure the same star made me and her.

“I think you need to have a conversation with her,” I told him.