Page 6 of Emily: Hello Kitten

If I give her a failing grade because she earns it, is she going to threaten to out us? There are so many things that could go wrong, and I’m prepared for none of them. Then again, I wasn’t prepared for Emily when she walked up to me. I wasn’t preparedfor her when we got to my house. I wasn’t prepared for her when I saw her sitting in my class.

I’m out of my comfortable orbit, completely tossed off kilter, and now I’m floundering.

I think I’m past forgetting my reckless, too-young, too-smart siren. But I have to try. There’s no alternative. I’m not going to fall for my student. I refuse to go down that road, even if it’s a road paved with just about everything I could possibly want and leads right to the only woman who’s snared my attention in years. And I’ve never been good at denying myself what I want most. Is it even worth trying when Emily has already overshadowed every other woman I’ve been with in the last ten years, and it only took her one night?

four

Emily

Wednesday, I did as he wanted, submitted my paper through a digital drop box and printed it out.

Even though I think it’s better to switch classes, Beth convinced me to give it another try, since I want to work in publishing. Yes, it’s a basic Lit course, but if I want to follow the next one, also one onlyheteaches, I need to pass this class.

So, now I’m clutching my two typed pages like they’re going to help me live as Beth

keeps trying to get me to chill out.

“Look, it’s just class. He’s just a professor,” she says.

“Yeah, and Hell’sjusta place,” I retort.

“It’s awkward, but it’s not going to get less awkward if you avoid it. Plus, you can’t start skipping classes. You T.A. here,” she hisses.

“Don’t remind me. I spent half of my T.A. time yesterday peeking around corners to make sure I wasn’t going to run into him,” I admit.

“What happened to my badass friend who isn’t afraid to tell a guy no, huh?”

My shoulders slump and as my lips part to speak, the door flings open and Dr. Hayes comes in.

Unlike Monday where he skewered me under his gaze, he artfully avoids me as we talk about the reading. He reads a section when no one volunteers to, and my mind swirls. Even Beth is focused and wrapped up in his beautiful, deep reading voice.

When he finishes, there’s a collective sigh around the room that pisses me off. It shouldn’t, because I’ve already decided I’m never going to touch him again, but I hate that others swoon just as easily as I did.

He’ll have no trouble getting another girl my age or a woman closer to his.

As someone raises their hand to answer a question I didn’t hear, I notice Dr. Hayes’ eyes flick to me. I’m sure it’s only a second, but it feels so much longer.

Kitten, I practically hear him whispering in my ear as his hands glide over my body and—no. Absolutely not. We’re not going down this road. I glance away and focus on taking notes until the end of class when we hand in our assignments.

“Ms. Turner,” Dr. Hayes says, softening his voice into a croon.

I don’t look up as I set the pages in his hand and walk away.

Beth complains that I’m being rude, but she’s cut off as we head our separate ways. Thankfully, the rest of the day is easy. Dr. Hayes is the only professor I have to worry about. Not that Iwantto worry about him. I’d love to forget him entirely at this point.

When I get lunch, I stare at my phone, ready to delete his number, but every time I try, I think of some very good reason not to. What if something happens and I’m going to miss class?I know it’s a stupid reason. Why would he even care if I text him to tell him I’m late or missing class? I can do everything online.

“Just do it. Be done with him so you can stay in class,” I whisper to myself.

But I don’t. Instead, I go to the school gym—a place I never thought I’d go. To get to the cardio machines, I have to walk through the weightlifting section. I keep my eyes trained in front of me until someone drops their weights a little too hard.

I glance over my shoulder and find green eyes staring me down. I blink, look over the face those eyes are attached to, and relax when it’snotAdrian.

I work out for an hour, dive into homework, take care of some work I need to do as a T.A., and try to exhaust myself thoroughly so I can stop thinking.

Adrian was a one-night stand. Just because he had my toes curling, my back arching, and made me moan until I was hoarse doesn’t make him impossible to replace. I was just drunk, easy to please, really horny.

Now I’m in control. It’s fine. Totally fine.

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