Page 59 of Hello Kitten

My brows tug together. “Changed?”

“I hate to say it, but in a good way. And I also know if there’s a bump in the road, you always use that to let it break you.”

I scoff and cross my arms. “I don’t sabotage my relationships.”

She laughs. “You always do. You always find something wrong, just so you can run.” No words come up asshe sighs and leaves. I slump on the bed. I need to breathe; I need to relax and then everything will be fine. I’m not destroying anything.

“You really want to be here, at a frat party?” Beth asks with surprise. “I figured you’d go see yourTinderman.”

“He’s pissed me off. I need to drink, have fun, and remember that I’m allowed to enjoy my twenties,” I decide.

I glance in the mirror on my right as music blares around me. I have on itty-bitty high waisted shorts that nearly show my ass. I pair it with a loose, crop top that has long sleeves. Cute and sexy since I don’t want to be too much.

Danielle raises a beer to me, and I take it, chugging it. I don’t want to feel jealous. But to see another student try to get closer to him, and then even another professor. It’s making me doubt myself.

It’s not like I can claim Adrian. I can’t tell anyone what’s going on and its nagging its way through my body, and making me wonder if Adrian even likes me more than an easy fuck. I know it should’ve stayed like that. Something dirty and easy.

But somehow, I can’t push this hurt down but drinking makes it easier. It numbs all that terrible stuff if I do it right.

I’m quickly buzzed. I flirt and tease Sean, but every time he gets too close, I return to Beth and Danielle. We dance and laugh, partying like we should and Adrian fades from my mind.

Beth pulls me to one of the tables and grins as she shows the tequila bottle and lemon slices.

A chuckle spills, and I climb on the table, lying on my back, and Beth fills my belly button with the strong liquor. I take the slices from her grip, and put one in my mouth as the room spins slightly.

She does a shot from my belly button, then Sean does as well. He leans over and pulls the lemon from my lips. He sucks as his gaze stays on me and then rips it from his mouth and bends closer, his lips almost touching mine and I turn my head, then slide off the counter.

I do a shot of tequila on my own, savoring the burn. I feel alive, tuned into the world without the fog that always comes around when I think of Adrian. So, I ignore my phone buzzing in my pocket as I drink and enjoy myself.

“I missed this!” Beth says brightly, then notices another drink in my hand.

We sing along to the music, hug each other, dance and laugh. We play beer pong too and I destroy the guys so they drink and I don’t have to flash my tits. We’re a laughing stumbling mess when we take our first break around eleven.

I check my phone and see a missed call from Adrian along with three texts.

Stay safe for me, kitten.

I’m worried about you.

Are you okay?

I sneer at my phone. I’m out having fun, like a good college student. This is what I’m supposed to do. I’ve done it for years—drinking, partying, enjoying myself—why does he get to suddenly say it’s not okay?

Especially considering what I heard, he doesn’t need to know about my night. I send one text.

Having fun. With friends. Talk tomorrow.

With that, I lock my phone. Beth dances with a few guys, rolling her hips against them. I join in, dancing with Sean, pulling away when he gets handsy despite my giggling. When he gives me a drink, I wink and lift it before taking a long drink.

“That’s the Emily I know,” he says with a chuckle, trying to pull me back. “Why don’t we find a private place?”

“You should try this! It’s good.” I shove the drink into his hands and lose myself in the crowd. I dance by myself, enjoying the music, the way I feel it across my body, in my heart, in my soul.

Another drink appears in my hand, and I look at it with confusion, but shrug until someone spills it. I huff as I’m splashed with alcohol. “Rude!”

I walk up to the table with all the bottles of alcohol and pour myself a drink. A tap on my shoulder makes me turn and I meetSean’s flirty gaze. “I’m not interested, Sean. You’re fun and hot. You’ll get a girl for you.”

“Why aren’t you interested?”