Page 56 of After-Party Consequences

Charlotte stopped beside the drawing table, where he had been working late all this week so he wouldn’t have to go back to his apartment alone and think about her.

‘It’s good to see you, Charlotte,’ he said. And meant it.

He didn’t know why she was here, and he really didn’t care. Because he felt like a starving man eating for the first time in days as he devoured the sight of her in tailored pants and a fitted blouse, her silky hair rioting around her face.

She sucked in a breath, her expression a vivid combination of anger and determination.

‘I need to know the truth...’ she said carefully, but he could see the swirl of sadness in her eyes, alongside the storm of outrage. ‘Did you tell me you wanted this baby when we found out I was pregnant simply to keep me with you until Labor Day? To win Helberg?’

‘What...?’The accusation came so far out of left field, he couldn’t make any sense of it.

‘I deserve to know...’ she said, her voice rising, her face rigid now with hurt. ‘Because Adam believes you did, and the way you left... I need to know exactly how much you used me and the baby to win the bet. So I can start to forgive myself for falling in love with you.’

Falling in love with you...

The words made the ache in his throat sink into his heart.

He stared at her, desperately trying to figure out what to say. Part of him knew he should tell her she was right. That he’d never really wanted this baby, that he’d used the pregnancy the same way he’d used her. Wouldn’t it be better for all of them? It would be the final nail in the coffin of this relationship. The relationship he’d been so terrified of nurturing or even acknowledging a week ago, when they’d seen the baby for the first time.

But somehow the words which would set him free, which would set them both free, wouldn’t come out of his mouth. Because he had missed her, so much, and he still wanted her, and he couldn’t bear to lie to her again.

So he continued to stand there dumbly, absorbing the sight of her, unable to say anything at all.

She stepped forward, the sound of her pumps somehow deafening on the office carpeting. The sheen of moisture in her eyes twinkled in the afternoon light pouring through the windows...and everything inside him became harsh and jagged. The intense longing to touch her again, to hold her, to never let her go was like a kudzu vine wrapping around his heart and squeezing hard enough to make his breathing stop.

‘I didn’t set out to hurt you...’ he said at last, which was at least the truth. But how could he have known she would come to mean so much?

‘You coward...’ she hissed, the single tear running down her cheek like an arrow to his heart. ‘You can’t admit it even now, can you? Why did you say you wanted the baby? When you didn’t? How could you use the pregnancy just to win a bet?’

He should let her believe it, but the pain in her voice broke him.

‘Because I didn’t. The bet had nothing to do with my feelings for the baby...’

Or you.

She walked forward, lifting her fists, and pushing them against his chest. ‘You’re lying. I know you’re lying.’ Her sobs wrenched at his heart. ‘Or why would you leave as soon as you won?’

‘It wasn’t about the bet...’ He grasped her fists and tugged her into his arms, no longer able to stop himself from holding her. ‘Not even in Italy.’

He felt the anger drain out of her until all that was left was the hurt.

She looked up at him, her ravaged face somehow so brave. ‘Then why did you leave me?’

He cupped her cheeks, brushed the last of her tears away with his thumbs. The brutal agony washed through him all over again. That terrible feeling of never being good enough, strong enough, to matter.

But he’d mattered to her. And he’d thrown it away.

‘I’m not sure I can explain it,’ he said, so glad to have her in his arms again he was scared even now to tell her what a coward he’d been.

She shook her head, then dragged herself back, out of his embrace. He felt the loss like a blow to the chest. She was trembling, the pain in her eyes unvarnished, but despite the hurt he could also see her strength, which only made him love and respect her more.

‘That’s not good enough, Cade. You made me believe it was my fault, but worse than that, when Adam mentioned the bet...’ She drew in a ragged breath. ‘I realised I didn’t know you well enough to tell if it were true. Because you always kept so much hidden.’ She swung away from him and walked to the glass wall, which looked down on the city he’d conquered. Achievements which meant nothing without her. ‘And that made me blame myself. Made me think it was my fault somehow...’

‘Damn it, Charlotte.’ He walked towards her, grasped her shoulders from behind, and pressed his face into her hair, unable to stop touching her, needing to hold her again. ‘You have to believe me,’ he said, inhaling the scent which had become a drug over the past weeks. ‘I didn’t walk away because of the bet.’

She turned to face him, dislodging his hands. And wrapped her arms around her waist to ward him off. ‘Still not good enough, Cade. You have to tell me why you left.’

He sighed and drew back. And turned to stare out at the view, not able to look at her when he told her the truth.

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