Page 87 of Make It Without You

“I do,” it comes out more like a question. “I haven’t watched a lot of baseball in a while.”

“Why not?”

I scoop some ice cream into my mouth before answering. “Someone very close to me was a big fan of baseball. And it felt wrong to watch it without him.”

Dylan looks at me like that’s crazy. At this age, I still don’t think kids understand loss. Sometimes I still don’t understand it. Losing someone. It’s like saying they’re lost in the store or at an amusement park.

“Does he still watch?”

“I’m sure he still does,” I confirm with a small smile.

Adam frees a knowing smile that soothes my nerves. Not just being with him and Dylan in a casual environment but talking about James.

I pepper Dylan with questions until his eyes begin to droop. Adam and I stand from the table, he picks Dylan and I gather our trash to toss.

Walking to our cars, I stand to the side as he tucks Dylan into his seat. Adam buckles him in and starts up his truck to cool the inside down.

“That wasn’t so bad,” Adam tells me.

“For you,” I confess.

He pulls me into his embrace and my arms wrap around his waist. “We’ll give it time. We still have your summer bucket list to complete.”

“That’s right. Now that Dylan knows, we just have to set some time aside.” I tilt my head up and rest my chin on his chest.

Adam pecks my lips with his, once, twice until he sinks into a kiss. My lips part and our tongues meet as they dance and tangle.My body moves closer to his. He pulls on my ponytail causing a moan to slip free. That’s when I know we need to stop our kiss.

I pull away, breathless and flushed. But not from the summer sun. “Go take him home. I’ll see you later.”

“Spend the night,” Adam blurts out.

“I would love to. But we just told him. How would that look if I was just there?”

“It would look like a relationship.” Adam deadpans.

“Okay, smartass,” I pinch his side again. “In a few days.”

“Deal. I love you.”

The smile that hits my face is uncontrollable. “I love you, too.”

Adam watches as I get in my car. I wave as I drive by and head home light. So light it’s as if I’m floating and nothing can bring me down.

But what I’ve come to learn is that when life is going too good, the other shoe is bound to drop.

Emily

Two Weeks Later

“Hi Mom,” I say into my phone.

The other end is silent until she speaks up. “Honey, it’s Gloria. She’s in the hospital.”

Tears instantly flood my eyes. For so long I thought that after James the people in my life were invincible.

“Is she okay?”

“No. Honey she didn’t want me to tell you, but she has cancer and it’s terminal. She doesn’t have long.”