Page 79 of The Night We Met

Theresa regards me carefully over the video call. Even not in the same space I feel two inches tall.

“What brought this on Kamryn?”

“Mason had a box delivered to my office. I was about to open it up when my mind went back in time. Those emotions I felt the first time was all I could feel. It didn’t matter that this box represents something good. My mind doesn’t know how to separate the good and the bad.”

For the last two years I continued to expect the bad. Apart from my brand becoming successful faster than I could have imagined, I was always waiting for the shoe to drop.

“It’s good you’re letting him back in.”

“Yeah but what if I let him all the way in and he doesn’t like what he sees?”

A pitying look from Theresa is the last thing I expected from as my therapist. In a blink that look is gone and in its place is one of professionalism. “If he doesn’t like what he sees, then he is not the one for you. Everybody is broken. Whether it’s a little crack or some pieces are completely gone. If Mason is who you hopefully think he is, then he will accept you for all of your broken pieces.”

I linger over her words. Barely catching what she tells me as we set a tentative appointment for two weeks from now.

“Open the box, Kamryn. And I’m not just talking about the metaphorical box. Not everything represents the bad.”

Our goodbye is quick and I continue to stare out of my office window. I turn over our talk in my head as I do after every session. I try reading between the lines, when what’s between the lines is nothing. Everything Theresa said is to the point and she validated my hidden fears.

With a resounding breath I get up and walk back over tothe box. And when I move the flaps of the box I see that the contents are nothing like what I’ve been given before.

My fears, while not unfounded, are unwarranted.

In this I see: an envelope with four tickets and 4 box & field passes, three Cincinnati Bengals jerseys with no numbers on the back, a Bengals jersey with Mason’s number on it, and a note at the bottom.

Kamryn,

I can’t wait for you to come to the game Sunday.

I have Monday off from all things related to football.

Come to the tunnel with the girls when the game ends.

Afterward, I plan to take you on an official, unrushed date.

Xoxo,

Mason

My mood rose after looking over the contents of the box. I couldn’t focus on work, so I sent my employees home early. I may have also been nervous about seeing Mason these next three days, so I managed to get last minute pamper appointments. After my toes and nails are done and freshly painted, I swing-by my favorite salon to get a fresh trim and a blowout. As if I wasn’t already nervous, the girls in the salon kept asking me about my love life and if they could get the inside scoop on my next line. I just gave them a tight-lipped smile and told them it’s all a work in progress.

“Hi, Lucy,” I greet with equal enthusiasm when I get home. Poppy views our interaction with as muchenthusiasm as she can from her spot on my couch. “Wanna go for a walk?” I ask her. If her wagging tail is any indication, then that’d be a yes. Setting my purse on the table and swapping out my flats for slip on sneakers. “Go get your leash for me sweet girl.” I had just planned to take Lucy on a walk around the neighborhood, but I was still full of restless energy so we found ourselves at the dog park. Smiling to myself as I watch Lucy play with other dogs, I can’t help but think about this coming weekend. I don’t want to move at lightning speed, but I'm at the point where it’s all or nothing with anyone I date.

After thirty minutes of Lucy running around playing with other dogs and chasing after squirrels, I whistled for her to come over to me. “Let’s go home sweet girl,” I say to her while petting her. Clipping her leash back on we make our way out of the park and back home.

Kamryn

I’m date night ready. And my nerves are through the roof.

My outfit is all black and while on video chat with my girls, I got made fun of for wearing all black. As if they don’t know it’s my go-to color for any sort of event and/or date, so attempting to sway me out of my outfit choice was a lost cause. As a millennial, phasing out the goth phase was a big mistake with my generation. Now look at us. Black jeans for nights out or black jackets to throw over top when running out the door. The goth phase is still truly alive.

My jeans sit perfectly on my hips, a black lace halter bodysuit that has a deep V in the front. I topped the bodysuit with a black blazer, black clutch with gold detailing that holds the essentials, and black Christian Louboutin heels. For how doom and gloom the color black is, it truly goes with everything. As the years went on, I slowly incorporated this timeless color back into my wardrobe before it took over my entire wardrobe. Essentially making the color an extension of myself. I’ll add color to my style every now and then, but black will always be my signature color.

Thinking of black being my signature color has me wanting to dedicate an entire ‘Ryn & Co.’ and ‘Kamryn’ line to the all-black wardrobe. I whip out my phone and make a quick note in it before I forget.

Once I’ve added to my list, I check over my makeup before deeming I can’t add anything more to my face. My makeup is done simple yet sexy with a simple eye look and deep red lip that helps accentuate the browns from my eyes. The curls from the blowout earlier today have loosened leaving my hair to fall in soft waves down my back. I gave up the fight in trying to get my natural curls to come back. The only time my natural curls make an appearance is if I jump in the ocean. Apparently that would require me to take a vacation, so they don’t make an appearance as often as one would hope.

I ordered an Uber before I spritzed perfume onto my pulse points, almost going overboard and drowning myself in the expensive bottle. My overthinking is driving me crazy and I’m grateful when the car pulls up so I can leave the perfume bottle on my dresser. Locking up my house I walk to the waiting car and get in. Once settled, I give the driver the address. And when we pull onto the main road, I’m finally given the chance to look out at the city as she drives me to Mason’s condo. After the Uber drops me off I give myself a pep-talk in the lobby of his building before walking up towards the concierge.